10 Wildest Borderlands Side Quests

Summary

Bizarre side quests in the Borderlands games offer wild humor and unique rewards like Sarah Palin-themed weapons.
Some of the funniest and most unique include a grim tea party, giving Claptrap a beard, and renaming bullymongs.
Some missions force players to make non-violent choices, throw parties for no-shows, and release a man from a porta-potty.

As a seasoned Borderlands enthusiast with over a decade of loot-shooting under my belt, I’ve stumbled upon some wild moments while traversing the desolate wastelands of Pandora and its spin-off worlds. However, few encounters have left as lasting an impression as these unforgettable side quests that border on the absurd.

The Borderlands series is bursting at the seams with an extraordinary level of eccentricity. It’s renowned for its outlandish characters, intense action, and offbeat comedy.

In Borderlands, not only do the main story quests offer an engaging experience, but the side quests truly push the envelope. They span from amusing one-liners you wouldn’t expect in a game to outlandish plots that lead to the most unforeseen twists and turns.

They frequently distribute distinct prizes that prolong the laughter beyond the completion of the quest. Here are some of the craziest, oddball, and most audaciously unusual side missions available in the game series.

10. Borderlands 2: Splinter Group

Psychos In A Half Shell, Turtle Power

Stepping into the world of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles-esque characters, not long after arriving at Sanctuary in Borderlands 2, Tanis tasks you with tracking down and eliminating a band of pizza-loving mutants.

In this thrilling scenario, I can’t help but swiftly grasp the situation at hand. As Tanis delivers his chilling arguments for the extermination of these mutants, I instinctively dive into the underbelly of the city, just as any dedicated fan would do. And lo and behold, there I find their lair: the Rat’s Nest, a hidden corner where these elusive creatures have made their home.

One at a time, you pull out the color-coded rodents labeled Lee, Dan, Ralph, and Mick. This seemingly trivial task within the game contains interesting nuances and even a touch of social satire.

Finishing this cameo task earns you Experience Points (EXP), and The RokSalt shotgun comes with a quote from Sarah Palin: “Don’t retreat. Instead, reload!”. Despite any lingering regret I might have felt about killing my childhood idols, the rapid-fire reload speed and high damage output of the corrosive RokSalt gun made it all worthwhile.

9. Borderlands 2: You Are Cordially Invited

Tina’s Torturous Tea Party

In Borderlands 2, this intricate storyline serves as your initial encounter with Tiny Tina. Following our meeting, she invites and recruits you for a grand tea party setup.

Initially, you ascend a mountain, vanquish a horde of varkids, and dismantle a bandit camp to accumulate provisions and rescue your friend, Sir Reginald. Subsequently, you skillfully lead the distinguished guest, Fleshstick, towards the dining table.

What follows is a grim revenge scene wrapped in pink. Tina tortures Fleshstick as his bandit friends come to set him free.

To safeguard the power source for Tina’s exhilarating tea party, I found myself forced to trample his troops. In due course, Tina gleefully flipped a switch, effectively incinerating the traitor who betrayed her family.

In this journey, Tina not only found a significant spot in my heart, but also proved to be more than just a comic relief. Her tale, rich in sorrowful layers, gives a meaningful backdrop to her gruesome actions.

Helping out with the task at hand will earn you cash, experience points, as well as the powerful Caustic Teapot revolver – a weapon known for its potent corrosive shots.

8. Borderlands 2: Kill Yourself

Handsome Jack’s Lose-Lose Proposal

There’s no question that Jack, our charming antagonist from Borderlands, stands out as the most exceptional villain. Unlike Bruce Wayne, he flaunts wealth without any regard for morality.

It’s not surprising that when he proposes a task for you to kill yourself for money, demonstrating his power, after reaching the Eridium Blight in Borderlands 2, because this is exactly what one might expect from him at that point.

At the Jack Bounty Statue, you can find this item, serving as a bold homage to its namesake. Upon acquisition, Jack presents you with two options: either leap from a precipice or press a button to contact the Hyperion Lifeline for Suicide Prevention.

Skipping the jump won’t get you any Eridium, but you’ll still earn Experience Points. However, both actions will provide you with Jack’s insightful comments.

I opted to jump for the Eridium and regretted nothing, despite the names Jack called me for it.

7. Assault on Dragon’s Keep: The Beard Makes The Man

Why Grow A Beard When You Can Steal One?

In the extra content for Borderlands 2 inspired by Dungeons & Dragons, titled Tiny Tina’s Assault on Dragon’s Keep, there is a side mission that involves creating an extraordinary beard for wizard Claptrap. As he himself puts it, “All powerful wizards sport impressive beards.

Since robots don’t have the ability to produce beards, it’s up to you to assist. In other words, his scheme involves acquiring the beards from some dwarves who are fond of alcohol.

To finish this task, you need to attract dwarves near some heavy mining machinery and trigger it to collapse on them (you can also make them drunk by shooting them with Miss Moxxi’s Grog Nozzle as an additional goal). Subsequently, prepare for a challenging and hazardous trek to the forge where you will assemble the beard parts in a grand manner.

Because it was effortless, I opted to make the dwarves intoxicated before subduing them, giving them some time to share their boisterous, drunken remarks. For successfully bearding Claptrap, you’ll receive currency, EXP, a personalized skin, and the wizard Claptrap will sport a magnificent beard permanently.

6. Borderlands 2: The Name Game

“Bullymong” Just Doesn’t Have A Ring To It

Sir Hammerlock, the erudite and genteel individual, is seeking assistance in devising an appealing new moniker for bullymongs. In Borderlands 2, taking up this quest from him in Sanctuary will lead you on a side-splitting expedition of research, homicide, and creature naming.

Initially, Hammerlock proposes names that reflect their behavior, making the process clear and significant from the start.

After publishers object, Hammerlock decides to change the names to “bonerfarts”, but only if the quest is at its final stage; this gives a strong incentive not to finish the quest.

Rewards for completion are money, EXP, and a shotgun or shield.

In the heat of the game, I chose to wield the shotgun as a means of defending myself against the hordes of crazed characters that tend to appear at this point.

5. Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands: Non-Violent Offender

Roll To Seduce A Range Of Curious Characters

As a gamer, diving into the magical realm of Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands, I can’t help but appreciate the timeless element it adds – a captivating love story that echoes the classic tabletop RPG themes.

Instead of the typical Borderlands mission that often requires excessive violence, this particular quest encourages you to navigate the situation by making non-lethal choices.

As a devoted follower, when I come face-to-face with the infamous Baaldar the Ghastly, I can choose to either cow him with my presence or try to charm him with my wit and allure.

When you meet Snacc, the valiant goblin guard, you can distract them, bribe them, or seduce them.

When you meet Broonfield the Ancient Guardian, you have options: engage in a fight with him, try to charm him, or simply listen to what he has to say.

Making these decisions will earn you either the Goblin’s Bane melee weapon or the Love Leopard rocket launcher. However, if you manage to charm everyone and then break up with Snacc, you’ll get the Love Leopard rocket launcher.

I chose a charming approach for the Unique Love Leopard, as its distinctive feature – firing heart-shaped ammunition that bursts into smaller hearts – truly captivated me, making the prospect of potentially hurting Snacc’s feelings slightly more bearable.

4. Borderlands 2: Claptrap’s Birthday Bash!

A Guest List Of One Makes Claptrap Very Sad

In simpler terms, this Borderlands 2 mission involves helping Claptrap celebrate his seventh birthday by organizing a party for him.

You roam about the town, delivering invitations to everyone he considers a friend, before returning to kick off the celebration. The boombox gets cranked up, initiating the tunes, followed by a 2-minute, 10-second countdown.

At the party, there were no attendees. Therefore, you found yourself spending the entire duration of the event solo, without any conversation, just observing Claptrap making an effort to maintain a cheerful demeanor and provide entertainment for you alone.

It’s incredibly awkward gameplay that really makes you feel for the guy. I dread this kind of moment in real life, so having to sit through it with one of my favorite characters overloaded my cringe sensors.

Enduring this quest rewards you with money, EXP, and a pistol or assault rifle.

3. Borderlands 3: Porta Prison

No Worse Place To Be Than Trapped In A Porta-Potty

In Borderlands 3, there’s an unforgettable side mission called “Trashmouth” where you must help liberate a man trapped inside a talking toilet with sentient abilities. To do this, you need to insert different AI programs into its control system.

In this game, I’ll be taking down his minions, including a few law-enforcement robots, while he desperately begs for rescue. I usually give NPCs a chance to speak until they finish their piece in games, and this quest is one of the most engaging times I’ve ever had doing so.

Once the portable toilet has been launched into the stratosphere, the whole adventure reaches its climax as you track down Trashmouth somewhere else, still trapped within his makeshift cell, and eliminating him.

Finishing this mission will net you cash, experience points, and a unique rocket launcher named the Porta-Pooper 5000, which, as expected, shoots fecal matter projectiles. This is one of the most creatively disgusting highlights in the original Borderlands trilogy’s fantastic gameplay.

2. Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands: Ron Rivote

An Imagined Adventure For A Literary Icon

Ron Rivote stands out as a unique non-player character, and he’s undoubtedly my top pick. His Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands journey mirrors the humorous parody of Don Quixote’s adventurous tale, with the narrative escalating to more and more absurd levels.

Despite being lively, Ron Rivote’s hold on reality seems unstable. He insists a clock tower is a cyclops, a castle is merely a shack, and he finds his supposed love in a broom, which he claims is a princess.

The one thing Ron is right about is that the area is dangerous. You have to battle many shroomlets along the path of adventure and protect Ron, who can often be found unhelpfully slamming his sword against his imagined clocktower cyclops.

Finishing this task earns you both Rivote’s Shield and Amulet. These items are imbued with powers drawn from the cherished sayings of their enigmatic ancestor, Rivote, whose story is yet to be uncovered.

Rivote’s Shield boosts your health regeneration rate significantly and speeds up your movement when you’re at full health. On the other hand, Rivote’s Amulet provides courage against larger enemies and certain elemental advantages – both are exceptional and rare artifacts worth pursuing.

1. Borderlands 2: Shoot This Guy In The Face

Well, He Did Ask For It, But That’s No Comfort

In this Borderlands 2 adventure, you’ll find some truly unforgettable and exhilarating moments on Pandora. It’s the quest that I always bring up when trying to persuade my friends to give the game a try.

While delving deeper into the main quest of Thousand Cuts, I come across a character – let’s call him Face McShooty. This guy isn’t your typical bad guy, but he sure is acting strangely. He’s yelling out for someone to do something unusual: shoot him right in the face! Quite intriguing, isn’t it? I can’t help but wonder what this is all about.

If you agree, you’ll have to endure his prolonged pleas for ammunition, with each missed shot resulting in another extended outburst.

As a dedicated gamer, this is undeniably the climactic point where even the smallest characters get their chance to speak. Blasting Face McShooty results in a straightforward “Thank you!” along with rewards like cash, experience points, and an overwhelming sense of moral ambiguity.

2024-12-19 06:09