😱 Bitcoin Bites the Dust: Losses Galore! 📉

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Oh boy, hold onto your digital wallets, folks! Bitcoin (BTC) has been doing the crypto equivalent of a belly flop, plummeting over 15% and hitting a low that would make even the most seasoned investor queasy – a mere $80,000. And if you thought that was bad, Glassnode, the blockchain busybodies, have cooked up an analysis that’s as juicy as a blockchain turkey on Thanksgiving. It turns out, the folks with the biggest financial paper cuts are the ones who just hopped on the BTC bandwagon. 🎢

Newbies to Bitcoin: Welcome to the Money Pit 🕳️

Last Friday, the 28th day of the shortest month, Bitcoin took a dive that would make an Olympic diver jealous, sinking below $80,000. It was like a throwback to November 2024, except less festive and more ‘oh no, my portfolio!’. The market’s reaction? A cool $685 million in realized losses, just tacked onto the already hefty $2.16 billion that vanished into the crypto ether from the 25th to the 27th. Glassnode’s analysts, with their x-ray specs on, spotted the trend: short-term holders (STH) are losing their crypto cookies faster than long-term holders. 🍪

According to Glassnode’s report, the biggest losers are the Johnny-come-latelies of the past week. The 1-day to 1-week holders are in the red by a whopping $238.8 million, while the 1-week to 1-month gang isn’t far behind at $187.6 million. And don’t feel left out, 1-month to 3-month holders, you’re down $132.4 million! Meanwhile, the 24-hour buyers are like, “We bought high and now we’re crying.” They’re out $104.9 million. But hey, it’s not all doom and gloom – the 3-6 month holders had a 95.4% spike in losses on Friday. Yay? 🎉

Peeking deeper into the crypto abyss, Glassnode found that the Friday fiasco pushed the Bitcoin loss rate to a staggering $57.1 million per hour. The STH are leading the charge in the race to the bottom, with the 1-day to 1-week holders losing a cool $19.9 million per hour. Not to be outdone, the 1-week to 1-month holders are shedding $13.9 million per hour, and so on and so forth. It’s like a game of who can lose the most money the fastest! 🏎️

As the curtain falls on this tragic crypto tale, the 1-day to 1-week holders are the stars of the show, doubling down on their losses like it’s going out of style.

Long-Term Bitcoiners: Chill as a Refrigerator 🥶

But wait, there’s a glimmer of hope in this sea of red! Glassnode’s data dump also reveals that the Bitcoin old-timers, those who’ve been holding steady for 6-12 months, are basically like, “Meh, just a flesh wound.” They’ve barely registered a blip on the loss radar. 📡

It seems these seasoned crypto warriors are unfazed by the market’s hissy fit. They’re confident that Bitcoin will shake it off and come roaring back, like a phoenix from the ashes – or a zombie from the grave, depending on how you look at it. As the digital ink dried on this story, Bitcoin was clawing its way back up to $85,200. The weekly losses still stand at a bruising 11.34%, but hey, at least it’s not a total crypto apocalypse. Yet. 🌋

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2025-03-01 15:15