😱 Crypto Mixer Wins! Court Says “No Way!” to US Sanctions

by

Hold onto your hats, folks, because this is a story straight out of Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, only with more lawyers and less chocolate. A US Court has just told the Department of the Treasury, “You’re wrong! You’re wrong! You’re wrong!” and overturned sanctions against Tornado Cash. It’s like a giant middle finger to the government 🖕, and trust me, it’s a sight to behold!

The Government Fumbled the Ball – Again!

Remember when the government decided to “punish” Tornado Cash for being a “money launderer”? Well, the court wasn’t buying it! It ruled that Tornado Cash, this magical crypto mixer, was just doing its thing, blending bits and bobs, and the government was just being a big, grumpy, overprotective parent!

Apparently, the US Treasury thought Tornado Cash was a criminal mastermind, responsible for all sorts of shady dealings. They were convinced that this magical mixer was the secret weapon of the North Korean hacking group, Lazarus Group. Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m picturing a bunch of North Korean spies in lab coats, trying to mix crypto like a cocktail at a fancy party 😂!

But the court was having none of it. They said, “This Tornado Cash thing? It’s just a bunch of code! We can’t punish a code! That’s like saying ‘we’re going to punish the alphabet because it’s used to write bad letters!’ ”

Now, there’s some smart cookie, Peter Van Valkenburgh, who’s like the lawyer for all things crypto, and he says this ruling is a “good news” story, but it’s not the end of the fight. He’s worried the government might try to pull some sneaky moves, but he thinks the court is on their side. He says “We should be rooting for” the code to be free! 😂

Big Win for Crypto Privacy

Even Vitalik Buterin, the big cheese behind Ethereum, is celebrating this win. He’s been a big fan of crypto privacy, saying it’s like a normal, everyday thing. This win feels like a victory for all the crypto lovers out there.

Buterin also had some kind words for Roman Storm and Alexey Pertsev, the two crypto wizards who got caught up in all this government drama. He thinks they should be released from the clutches of the legal system. He said, “No man should be left behind!” And you know what? I agree! It’s time for some freedom for these crypto heroes! 🙌

Poor Alexey Pertsev is in a bit of a pickle. He’s locked up in the Netherlands, serving time for a crime he didn’t commit! Meanwhile, Roman Storm is facing some serious charges back in the US. The government seems to have it in for these guys, but I think they should get a second chance.

Read More

2025-01-23 14:26