🤑 Bitcoin Laughs at Trump’s Tantrums While Sitting Pretty at $116K! 😂

Well, bless my stars and garters, if it ain’t the grand old man of bluster himself, Donald Trump, spoutin’ off again like a steamboat with a leaky boiler. Seems he’s got the notion that the war twixt Russia and Ukraine could end quicker than a cat can lick its ear-but only if NATO dances to his fiddle. 🤹♂️

The man who once claimed he could shoot somebody on Fifth Avenue and not lose a voter is now urgin’ all them NATO nations to stop buyin’ oil from Russia. Says it’ll weaken their hand, like a poker player with a pair of deuces. And that ain’t all-he’s itchin’ to slap “major sanctions” on Russia, but only if everybody in NATO holds hands and sings Kumbaya first. 🙄

Now, Trump’s got a peculiar way of seein’ things. He reckons this whole mess wouldn’t’ve happened if he was still sittin’ in the big chair. Nope, this here’s Biden’s and Zelenskyy’s war, he says, and he’s just the hero ridin’ in to save the day-and “thousands of Russian and Ukrainian lives,” no less. Humble as ever, that one. 😏

“If NATO does as I say, the war will end quicker than a fat man on a hot tin roof, and all them lives’ll be saved! If not, y’all are just wastin’ my time, and the time, energy, and money of the good ol’ U.S. of A.,” – Trump drawled, with all the modesty of a peacock in full strut.

And what’s more, he’s got his eye on China now, too. Says slappin’ 50% to 100% tariffs on ‘em will break their “grip” on Russia. Grip? Sounds more like he’s tryin’ to wrestle a bear with a toothpick. 🐻

BREAKING: President Trump says all NATO nations are gearin’ up to “do major sanctions on Russia” and slap tariffs on China so high they’ll need a ladder to climb ‘em.

– The Kobeissi Letter (@KobeissiLetter) September 13, 2025

Now, you’d think all this macroeconomic hullabaloo would send the cryptocurrency markets into a tizzy, especially on a weekend when the rest of the financial world’s takin’ a nap. But nope. Bitcoin’s sittin’ there cooler than a cucumber in a icebox, up 5% in the past week and holdin’ steady at $116,000, like it’s laughin’ at Trump’s theatrics. 😂💰

Seems the only thing unfazed by Trump’s threats is Bitcoin itself. Maybe it’s got better things to do than listen to a man who thinks he can solve the world’s problems with tariffs and bluster. 🌍🤷♂️

2025-09-13 18:15

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