This Dutch Outfit Will Hoard 1% of ALL Bitcoin-Euronext Braces for the Madness! 🚀

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Lurking in the low-lands like a very tidy dragon eyeing a shiny hoard, Amsterdam-based Amdax has declared that it’s about to birth a brand-new creature from the accounting egg. It’s called AMBTS-which, if you say it fast after two stroopwafels and a coffee, sounds like a sneeze but allegedly stands for Amsterdam Bitcoin Treasury Strategy. The plan? Accidentally on purpose end up owning one whole percent of all the Bitcoin that will ever be. No biggie, just 21 million coins and change-give or take a few forever-lost thumb drives at the city dump. 🤷‍♂️

So, why is Amdax doing this?

Well, gentle reader, the short answer is, “Because everyone else is doing it and peer pressure works on corporations too.” Governments, institutions, corporations, and your auntie’s knitting club now collectively sit on >10 % of Bitcoin’s supply. Sensing the FOMO wave rising faster than the average Dutch levee, Amdax reckons Europe needs its own bumper-sticker-worthy HODL fund. “We’ve got clogs, tulips, cheese, and now-Bitcoin! Nice and balanced portfolio,” said absolutely nobody, but Amdax liked the idea anyway.

Lest you think this is another weekend hobby project, CEO Lucas Wensing stepped out from behind a windmill and declared, “With 10 % of Bitcoin stuffed into various institutional socks, it’s only logical we upgrade to the full European legwear experience and list on Euronext Amsterdam. Join us; the water’s great, just don’t forget your regulatory armbands.”

How will AMBTS actually melt GPUs operate?

Imagine a teenager who is technically independent but still raids the parental fridge and uses the laundry downstairs. That would be AMBTS in relation to Amdax. AMBTS will swan about doing its own thing, while quietly popping back for Amdax’s five years of regulatory training wheels and the occasional ISAE 3000 type II lollipop. Translation for the humans: the grown-ups are watching, and they even know what an “audit trail” is without googling. 🎓

Money will arrive first via private pockets, then via gawking public markets. If the IPO-style space elevator actually reaches orbit, AMBTS could proudly strut around as Europe’s first publicly listed Bitcoin treasury company. Somewhere in Valhalla, Satoshi is face-palming and muttering, “I said peer-to-peer, not Euronext-to-Euronext…”

Risk Management-or How Not to Lose the Keys to the Kingdom

Amdax, being Dutch and therefore contractually obligated to be organised, already sits under a triple-decker compliance sandwich. They’ve been registered with the Dutch Central Bank since 2020-first in line, top of the class, gold star sticker on the ledger. Add independent oversight (not just the janitor with a clipboard) and regular audits so stern they make double-entry bookkeeping look like interpretive dance, and suddenly holding a metric boatload of volatile internet money feels almost… sensible?

Skeptics will note the pile of melted exchanges and frostbitten wallets that line the crypto-history books. Amdax counters by saying, “Yes, but we use checksums, cold storage, multi-sig, firewalls, gouda cheese, and a team that actually reads the footnotes.” In Diskworld terms: it’s like keeping the gold in the actual vault, not in a runaway luggage with legs. 🧳✨

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2025-08-18 16:49