Monsieur Benjamin Cowen, the oracle of our digital doubloons, hath gazed into his crystal ball (or YouTube analytics) and proclaims: “Friends, take heed! One grand gesture by our financial overlords at the Federal Reserve could make our noble Bitcoin and its trusty altcoin squire tumble, nay, plummet!”
In a session fit for the salons of Versailles, Cowenaddresseth an assembly of 922,000’d YouTube courtiers: “Should the Federal Reserve, ever capricious, slice yonder interest rates next month, behold! Not only your beloved stocks, but crypto too, shall taste the bittersweet pang of correction when bond yields ascend like the price of Parisian rent.”
Certainly, bond yields, those treacherous sprites, leap skywards after the Fed’s scissors have sliced the rates-markets, ever anxious as a mistress awaiting a letter, fret over inflation’s rising perfume. Thus, the long-term yield, a cunning fox, prance higher to ensure investors aren’t paid in stale baguettes.
Says this wise analyst:
“Altcoins will likely receive-how shall I say-a correction most severe against their good friend, the US dollar, come September. Why? Because Bitcoin, that king of coins, wishes to promenade along the bull market support band (yes, a band more fickle than Harpagon’s affections).”
“‘But Benjamin!’, many cry, ‘what of these whispered rate cuts?’ Ah, the answer is not so simple, mes amis. The market, like a cunning valet, prices all things before the master arrives! It is as if we start worrying about the bill before even ordering wine.”
“So, whilst the Fed most probably snips rates in September, the bond market-ever the sulking cousin-may respond with a negative wail! 🎭”
“And if the Fed indeed plays its cards, the 10-year yield, our drama queen, will quite likely soar like Don Juan leaping from a window. That, dear reader, could lead to Bitcoin taking a humble bow and retreating-perhaps even back to the bull market support band.”
For those less familiar with technical wizardry: the bull market support band is basically two moving averages (20-week SMA and 21-week EMA) dancing a slow waltz to the tune of investor nerves.
Last week, the Producer Price Index (PPI)-the thermometer of inflation-spiked like Molière’s blood pressure reading a bad review. Cowen, our ever-anxious protagonist, thinks this could prod our bond yields higher than Tartuffe’s hypocrisy.
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2025-08-19 13:07