Japan’s Bitcoin Titans Acquire like Macaulay Culkin in ‘Kevin Saves Christmas’ 🌟🤑📈

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So, Metaplanet, this top Bitcoin treasury firm in Japan, decides to bulk up their Bitcoin stash by 1,009 BTC. Now they’re sitting pretty at 20,000 BTC. And guess what? They’ve got to do all this while throwing out 11.5 million new shares like candy on Halloween. 🍬🎃

According to their announcement on Monday-because Monday’s the best day to make announcements, obviously-a whopping 1,009 BTC hit the cart and they reached 20,000 for about 16.479 billion yen (which I think is almost like $112 million). On the same cosmic day, they announced this fancy issuance of 11.5 million new shares last week, because of some investor, you know, flexing their warrant muscles to snag some stock. 🤼‍♂️

Hey, guess who’s doing all this shenanigans? Metaplanet. Currently sitting pretty as Japan’s top Bitcoin treasury. According to BitcoinTreasuries.net, which obviously never lies and never sleeps, they bought Bitcoin at an average of $102,607 a coin. This nets them a nifty little 6.75% profit in comparison to Bitcoin’s begging me for money price today. 📈

Alright, so this investor-Evo Fund, for short-splashed out and scooped up 10 million shares at $5.67 and a sprinkle more at just under $6, for a total laugh of about $65.73 million. And guess what? Metaplanet, being the smart little bean counters they are, uses that cash to darling-early redeem around $20.4 million in bonds. And good ol’ Evo Fund still has dibs on an additional 34.5 million shares. Who knew this was a buffet? 🍽️

Metaplanet Reacts to Market Pressure

The other big news: Metaplanet’s shares have been melting faster than ice in a sauna-a humbling 54% drop since mid-June. And look at us, Bitcoin’s been prancing about 2% higher. I mean, come on, who couldn’t see that coming? 🔄

Analysts, bless their hearts, kept pointing out how less appealing it’s become for Evo Fund to use its warrants because, well, money’s tight. This limiting liquidity thing means Metaplanet might not be able to hoard as many Bitcoins. But hey, they’re rolling with it and adapting-impressive, if you ask me. 🎭

Last week, they decided to spring into action and raise a cool 130.3 billion yen ($880 million) through a share offering-like selling chocolate for takeaway, but overseas this time. Now, today, their shareholders throng for a vote on whether to launch up to 555 million preferred shares, potentially ballooning up to 555 billion yen ($3.7 billion). And that’s over 1 trillion yen on the line. Holy cow! 🐄

Bitcoin Treasuries: Not All That Gazelle

Remember those neat strategies companies like Strategy, or, uh, MicroStrategy were supposed to follow? Yeah, well-not everyone’s having a soap opera success. Because, you know, not all sunshine leads to rainbows. 🌧️

Some Bitcoin treasuries are drowning. If Bitcoin’s price decides to do a nose-dive and stock premiums go bye-bye, funding opportunities dry up. And then, bam! You find yourself more Bitcoin-selling than even your ex. It’s like playing hot potato with margin calls-you won’t know what hit you. 😲

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2025-09-01 13:56