In the shadowed alleys of Solana’s digital bazaar, where the air hums with the static of a thousand wallets, Phantom-a name whispered like a lullaby to crypto dreamers-has conjured a phantom of its own: CASH. A stablecoin, they call it, though “stable” feels like a joke told by a drunken oracle. Launched September 30, it joins the chaos of the stablecoin wars, where titans clash over who gets to mint the next dollar-shaped piggy bank. 🐷💸
Mert of Helius, that prophet of blockchain’s end-times, declared, “The stablecoin wars on Solana are about to heat up.” Ah, yes, because nothing says “peaceful coexistence” like issuers hoarding yield like Scrooge McDuck in a liquidity pool. But fear not! Mert promises the dawn of a new age where users, not backroom deal-makers, will feast. Or so he says… 🤷♂️
Phantom’s stablecoin now floats on Solana’s waves,
Backroom deals will drown in the tide of change,
– Mert | Helius.dev (@0xMert_) September 30, 2025
Phantom, ever the showman, claims CASH is “built for everyday life,” as if crypto needed a babysitter. Bridge, the issuer, presumably serves as both midwife and bartender. And oh, there’s a Stripe partnership on the horizon-because nothing says “effortless” like bridging crypto to the mundane world of credit cards and coffee shops. ☕💳
Our mission? To make crypto safe and effortless,
As if such words could tame the beast of volatility,
– Phantom (@phantom) September 30, 2025
The Stablecoin Supercycle: A Dance of Greed
Behold the “stablecoin supercycle”-a phrase so grand it makes Genghis Khan blush. It’s the latest meme in crypto’s hall of mirrors, where product-market fit is just a fancy way of saying, “We’ve convinced people to pay us to hold their money.” And the wars? Oh, they’re here. Solana and Ethereum, those dueling gladiators, will duel to the death over who gets to host the next stablecoin dynasty. 🛡️⚔️
With $297.79 billion in stablecoin market cap (thanks, DeFiLlama!), the world’s most powerful central banks must be watching nervously. Meanwhile, Tether, Cloudflare, Visa, and a parade of tech giants shuffle their feet, ready to pounce. It’s a circus, and the clowns are all wearing Bitcoin hats. 🤡🎩
Total value locked in DeFi and stablecoin market cap chart as of September 30, 2025 | Source: DefiLlama
And so, as the stablecoin wars rage on, we are left to wonder: Will CASH be a phoenix rising from the ashes, or just another crypto snowflake? Only time-and the next rug pull-will tell. 🕰️💣
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2025-09-30 22:57