From the depths of his federal cage, where the clinking of shackles mingles with the echoes of shattered dreams, Sam Bankman-Fried, the fallen titan of crypto, has deigned to bestow upon us his wisdom. In a missive that reeks of both desperation and delusion, he credits the great helmsman of Mar-a-Lago, Donald Trump, for “fixing” the SEC. Ah, the SEC-that bureaucratic behemoth, whose tentacles once threatened to strangle the very life from the crypto realm. But fear not, for Trump, with a stroke of his golden pen, replaced the scourge Gensler with the savior Atkins. A tale as old as time: the villain vanquished, the hero crowned.