Ray Dalio

The system permits Binance users to identify emergency contacts—no, not your favorite barista, actual heirs—capable of invoking the claim. Verifying one’s demise (bring a death certificate, not a telegram from Yalta) allows these lucky inheritors to access the shimmering digital vault. The function works with only the choicest of cryptocurrencies (Bitcoin, Ethereum, Binance Coin)—sorry, Dogecoin hodlers, maybe next afterlife.

New data reveals a brutal -$36 billion cumulative buy/sell volume gap for altcoins (excluding BTC and ETH) over the past year. It’s like watching a slow-motion train wreck—liquidity is bleeding out faster than my will to go to the gym! 🏋️‍♀️

Durov, the debonair tech baron, has now, through judicious deployment of legal wrangling and persistence that would make a woodpecker envious, won the court’s nod to desert the Gallic utopia for up to 14 days. Destination: Dubai, land of shiny skyscrapers, bottomless brunches, and Telegram HQ.

Not just for tweets and cat videos anymore, X will soon let users make investments or trade stocks. Yes, you read that right—soon, you could be making money moves while reading about the latest celebrity drama. Can’t wait for those market predictions alongside memes, eh?

With that warning banner now as absent as a politician’s promise, Pitgo is strutting back into the Pi ecosystem like it owns the place. Users can now hop on the Pi Browser and use Pitgo Services to book their travels, exchange Pi cryptocurrency, and who knows, maybe even find a good deal on a one-way ticket to the moon! 🌕

Despite receiving new institutional support, there were still vulnerabilities, as Canadian blockchain investor Sol Strategies submitted an application to the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission on June 18, aiming for a Nasdaq listing with the symbol STKE.

Picture it: Washington, DC, buried under paperwork, printing money like it’s going out of style (it is). Meanwhile, somewhere in cyberspace—probably wearing sunglasses, let’s be honest—Bitcoin’s stoically mining new blocks. Started life as a digital experiment, now strutting around as a global asset like the world’s nerdiest Cinderella. 👠💻

Recent whispers in the corridors of finance reveal that the open interest in XRP futures has swelled to a staggering $5 billion. Such a figure suggests a veritable frenzy of speculative activity in the derivatives market. Our astute observer, Ryan Lee, chief market analyst of Bitget, proclaims, “This spike suggests strong potential momentum, with market participants bracing for a decisive move.” Ah, the drama of it all!

Bubblemaps, a name with all the subtlety of a steamboat whistle, have hitched their wagon to TON, bringing what they call “visual analytics” to the blockchain. If that sounds like snake oil to you, hang on, because as of June 19, anyone with more curiosity than sense can poke around TON and watch those crypto shenanigans pop up as colorful little bubbles. Even your Aunt Sally could probably follow along (if she could figure out where she left her glasses). 🤓

BlackRock’s Ethereum ETF (ETHA) remains the Gatsbyesque party host, seizing $15.1 million in inflows and yawning over its mountain of $5.3 billion poured in since inception. Net assets? A casual $4.19 billion. One wonders if they store these funds in some giant vault, à la cartoon billionaires, or if the numbers simply shimmer on the spreadsheet like mirages in the crypto desert.