In a world hustling for novelty, Standard Chartered have seen fit to predict that Bitcoin—our favourite financial party trick—may ascend to an absolutely criminal $120,000 in Q2 of 2025. One imagines the champagne will run out before the euphoria does. 🥂
Apparently, with its current trajectory (something between the ascent of a rocket and a soufflé that simply refuses to collapse), Bitcoin may dazzle us all with a swan dive to $200,000 by the end of 2025. That’s a rather decadent 110% leap from the present, which has even the most stoic investors reaching for their monocles. 🎩
Bitcoin Soars—The Term Premium Tango
Enter Geoff Kendrick—an analyst with a taste for drama—pointing at the US Treasury term premium like it’s an exotic liqueur nobody quite understands, but everyone agrees looks impressive on the shelf. A 12-year high, no less! Supposedly, when yield curves get steamy, Bitcoin comes out to play. Rather the Gatsby of the markets, is it not?
Kendrick also insists that the whales—a whimsical term for investors with more Bitcoin than sense—have been on a shopping spree. Think Harrods on Boxing Day, but with digital coins instead of designer handbags. Strategy (née MicroStrategy) apparently leads this parade, guided by the ever-enthusiastic Michael Saylor, the only man to make Bitcoin accumulation sound like a credible hobby.
Sideways Glances: The Dreaded Doldrums?
Meanwhile, funds have been tiptoeing into Bitcoin ETFs, escaping the claws of gold and the ennui of tradition. BTC is now the cocktail party ice-breaker for asset managers who’ve run out of anecdotes involving Swiss francs.
Spot prices, as of a particularly uninspired Monday, loitered around $95,300—a figure less inclined to drama, more Luton Airport than Monaco Grand Prix. Flat for the year, up 51% from last year; one feels compelled to golf-clap politely. 👏
Kendrick, ever the cautious guest, warns that a calm after the storm often heralds the arrival of sideways trading, which everyone agrees is terribly dull. Meanwhile, Damir Tokic over at Seeking Alpha would like a word: if the market continues its impersonation of Icarus, and the Nasdaq 100 nosedives, BTC might follow in lockstep—unless it doesn’t, in which case, rejoice.
At the time of writing, Bitcoin pirouetted below $95,000, settling at a delightfully arbitrary $94,560. Still, that’s up 1.1% in 24 hours—a morsel of excitement for the day traders. Ethereum, not to be outdone, has vaulted ahead with a 14% leap, presumably to remind everyone it, too, attended finishing school. XRP and Solana (SOL) trail behind, but only slightly—like runners-up in a beauty contest for digital assets. 💃
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2025-04-29 15:06