Bitcoin to $65K? Hold My Coffee and My Altcoins! ☕📉

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Bitcoin’s been on a rollercoaster this week, and not the fun kind with cotton candy. Thanks to Trump’s tariff announcement, it’s been bouncing around like a toddler on a sugar high. 🎢

It started the week at $84,000, peaked at $87,000 on Wednesday (woo!), and now it’s back to $83,000 (boo!). Honestly, it’s like watching a soap opera, but with more math. 📈📉

In the last 24 hours, $89 million got liquidated. Most of that was from long positions, which is trader-speak for “Oops, I thought it was going up.” 💸

Van de Poppe, the crypto equivalent of your overly optimistic gym coach, says, “Corrections are healthy!” He’s all about the waves, man. 🌊 He’s also like, “Don’t panic, Bitcoin’s still on an uptrend!” Sure, Jan. He also thinks Bitcoin’s at a key level, which is code for “It could drop to $65,000 if it doesn’t stay above $68,000.” Yikes. 😬

While Bitcoin’s hogging the spotlight, van de Poppe’s got his eye on altcoins. He’s like, “Bitcoin’s taking a nap, so maybe altcoins will wake up and do something.” 🛌➡️🚀

But let’s be real, altcoins have had a *disastrous* quarter. Ethereum dropped 44%, which is worse than my last attempt at baking. 🍰💥 He’s calling it the worst period for Ethereum ever, except for that one time in 2018. So, silver lining? 🤷‍♀️

Despite the doom and gloom, van de Poppe’s still holding out hope. He’s like, “We don’t have a bull market; we just have a Bitcoin run.” So, basically, altcoins are the underdogs waiting for their Rocky moment. 🥊

Meanwhile, some folks think this dip is just a shakeout. Translation: Big players are trying to scare off the weak hands before the price goes up again. Crypto Michaël’s calling it “a gift” for anyone who missed the boat earlier. 🎁 But let’s be honest, gifts are usually less stressful. 🎉

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2025-04-04 19:48