Bitcoin to Hit $400K? This Trader’s Wild Prediction Will Shock You! 🚀

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A crypto soothsayer-let’s call him Kaleo the Cryptic-has peered into his crystal ball (or perhaps just a very fancy Excel sheet) and declared that Bitcoin might just be scribbling a years-long, sky-high, bullish doodle. And by doodle, we mean a pattern that could make Scrooge McDuck weep with envy.

This mysterious trader, who hides behind a pseudonym like a villain in a children’s book, whispers sweet nothings to his army of 729,700 followers on X (formerly Twitter). His prophecy? Bitcoin could moonwalk its way to a staggering $400,000 by 2028-before, of course, tripping over its own shoelaces and tumbling back down.

Kaleo insists Bitcoin is following something called a Livermore Accumulation Cylinder. Sounds fancy, doesn’t it? Like a steam engine invented by a mad scientist. It’s actually named after Jesse Livermore, a trader from the olden days (early 1900s) who probably wore a top hat while shouting “Buy! Sell!” into a candlestick phone.

These Livermore Cylinders, apparently, involve Bitcoin bouncing around like a hyperactive kangaroo inside an ascending megaphone-higher highs, higher lows, until it finally rockets out of the pattern like a champagne cork at a very posh party.

“Bitcoin anywhere under $100,000 is free.” -Kaleo, probably while sipping a latte made of liquid gold.

The analyst, now smug as a cat who got the cream, says Bitcoin’s recent price jump is just the universe nodding along to his genius theory. “It’s happening.” (Cue dramatic music.)

At press time, Bitcoin is lounging at $97,682-up a modest 3.7% in a day. Pocket change, really.

Kaleo also predicts that altcoins-those scrappy underdogs-will eventually outshine Bitcoin once the big daddy crypto reclaims its six-figure throne. His motivational speech? Pure gold:

“Fellas, I can’t stress this enough: Bitcoin will send well above $100,000 again. We will see another massive altseason that happens with that move. It’s not a matter of if, but when. Similar to how silver bulls sounded insane for years, you probably feel slightly crazy right now. All it takes is a few green candles to go from people laughing at you to people begging you for advice. Keep your conviction, and focus on positioning yourself for when that day comes. Work harder when everyone else is complaining about how much things suck. Stay bullish.”

Translation: HODL like your life depends on it, and ignore the neigh-sayers (unless they’re actual horses).

Finally, Kaleo turns his prophetic gaze to PENGU, the token of the Pudgy Penguins NFT collection-because nothing says serious finance like cartoon birds. He claims PENGU is warming up for a breakout, like a penguin preparing to belly-slide into glory.

“PENGU pump is just getting started. We’re in a similar place now to where we were in late April. Accumulating after making a break above resistance from a major downtrend. Only a matter of time before this flies back to the highs.”

PENGU is currently waddling along at $0.01313, up a chirpy 2.7% today. Not quite a rocket yet, but hey-even penguins have to start somewhere.

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2026-01-15 11:29