Crypto news

Bitcoin clings to $90k like a koala to Eucalyptus, while the Fear and Greed Index moonwalks into “I give up, take my crypto.” 🐰💸

As the clock ticked towards the moment of reckoning, Sei lingered at $0.1249 at the hour of disclosure, falling by 1.4% over a day’s spinning, remaining tethered to its $0.12 mooring as it awaited the supply that soon would be free. Over a week’s swirl, SEI danced within a range of $0.1241-$0.1477, resting 6.4% lower than its prior week’s high-flying adventures.

Instead of looking at specific cryptocurrencies, Hashdex focuses on the growing use of crypto technology – especially in areas like payments, financial markets, and systems that rely on data.

Itau Unibanco, the Brazilian banking giant with more customers than a Black Friday sale (nearly 100 million!), has finally decided Bitcoin isn’t just for nerds and criminals. 🧑‍💻✨

These cases, dropped like hot potatoes, were tied to political donations and business ties as tangled as a sailor’s knot. A symphony of loopholes, orchestrated by the Trump family’s crypto empire, where every note is a nickel and a prayer.

Can you believe it? On December 15th, Phantom excitedly twirled on its stage and announced that its magical “Phantom Cash prepaid debit card” rollout is happening in the U.S., said goodbye to being just a regular joe crypto wallet, and suddenly it’s aiming to be an everyday money app. Marvelous!

The charts say SHIB is still hanging out below all the important lines. It’s like trying to get a date after accidentally calling your crush by their mom’s name – not ideal. Every time it tries to rally, sellers just shut it down. Rude.

As of December 14, 2025, Pepe’s price is hanging around a measly $0.000004380-hardly enough to buy a gumdrop, but hey, it’s something! Just yesterday, it nearly sneaked up to $0.00000441, inching forward by a tiny 1.85%. Woohoo! The rebound sprouted from a demand zone that’s been doing a good impression of a trusty old support pillow-bless its heart. Even with all the shenanigans in the crypto world, Pepe’s buyers are still clinging on like a cat on a hot tin roof, whispering, “Not today, bearies!”

Stablecoins, apparently, are processing $46 trillion in transactions. That’s more than the GDP of a few small countries and about the same as the number of times I’ve tried to understand blockchain. But here’s the kicker: they’re still trying to play nice with the old financial system, which is like teaching a toddler to drive a semi-truck. “Connecting digital dollars to existing financial rails” sounds exciting until you realize “existing financial rails” is just a fancy way of saying “a mess of outdated systems.”

With the solemnity of a 19th-century pamphleteer, Aevo unveiled a manifesto detailing its plan to dismantle Ribbon’s decentralized options vaults, victims of a Yuletide hack that spirited away $2.7 million from contracts as obsolete as a quill pen. Users, we are told, may withdraw funds posthaste once a contract upgrade debuts-next week, if the stars align. 🚀