Crypto news

Apparently, Iran has decided that if you can’t beat the sanctions, you might as well bitcoin them. According to the Financial Times, Tehran is demanding that shipping companies cough up the fee in digital assets, primarily bitcoin, because nothing says “hard-to-trace” like a cryptocurrency transaction. Hamid Hosseini, the spokesperson for Iran’s Oil, Gas, and Petrochemical Products Exporters’ Union, explained that the system is designed to slow traffic on Iran’s terms. Because, you know, nothing says “we’re in control” like making tankers pay in a currency that fluctuates more than my mood on a Monday.

Stablecoins, once the quirky side project of the crypto world, have quietly become the prom queen of global finance. In 2025, they processed $33 trillion in on-chain transactions, outpacing Visa and Mastercard’s combined efforts. According to Morph, these digital dollars have evolved from speculative playthings to the backbone of institutional payments. And they did it all without a single commercial featuring a celebrity or a catchy jingle. Take that, legacy systems.

This financial ballet, valued at a mere £11 million (or so the plebians claim), follows their oh-so-serious treasury management framework, unveiled in the sweltering summer of June 2025. How quaint.

Now, Todd, the ever-diplomatic Bitcoin pioneer, has decided to share his thoughts on the whole fiasco, offering a masterclass in how not to be misrepresented by modern journalism. You see, in his latest post on X (formerly known as Twitter, because we’ve all decided we need to keep rebranding things to sound fresher), Todd has accused the creators of the HBO documentary “Money Electric: The Bitcoin Mystery” of a little something called “manipulation.” Oh, how charming.

Mastermind Reece Merrick, floating in the early morning air of San Francisco, took to X-Twitter’s successor species-shouting from the rooftops about another big leap from the company’s headquarters.

Technical patterns, like old habits, die hard. They creep across markets like tumbleweeds, carrying echoes of the past. Analysts, those modern-day fortune-tellers, pore over charts like farmers reading the clouds. But this time, the comparison ain’t your usual crypto-to-crypto or gold-to-Bitcoin hoedown. No, sir. This one’s got Ethereum dancing to Netflix’s tune from 2003 to 2009, a period so sideways it could make a prairie dog dizzy.

Now we’re all rummaging the attic to see if the bulls can keep humoring the rally. A slide into the $400 club? That only works if we punch above $350’s shoulder and laugh all the way to the bank.

Thus comes the grand tour: an acquisition, a miracle, a romantic fluff of two licensed U.S. payment and wallet firms-Coinme and Sequence-loping into the story as if at a particularly opulent tea party. Their merging is less a business merger and more a choreographic marvel, fusing fiat on‑ and off‑ramps, wallets, and settlement apparatus into a coherent, all‑in‑one payments stack. One might even say that Polygon has turned its once‑arbitrary brushes of blockchain into a finely tuned rosary of monetary punctuation.

Key Takeaways:

Gareth Soloway, who presumably has a crystal ball or at least a very shiny abacus, reckons the next test is around the $75,000-$76,000 range. If it succeeds, we could see $80,000-$85,000 in the near term. Or, you know, not. It’s crypto-expect the unexpected, unless you’re expecting the unexpected, in which case, expect the expected.