Crypto news

Ah, the crypto markets-those delicate flowers, ever so sensitive to the whims of bureaucracy. The U.S. government, in its infinite wisdom, has decided to take a sabbatical, delaying the Nonfarm Payrolls (NFP) report until such time as it can be bothered to resume operations. The Bureau of Labor Statistics, with all the drama of a Victorian novelist, has declared the data shall remain locked away until the coffers are replenished. How quaint.

Thus, we find BTC ensnared in a corrective structure, much like a butterfly trapped in a net, unless it can convincingly reclaim the elusive $80,000 resistance. Until such a time, our market remains poised at a near-term turning point, with traders peering over their shoulders to see if Bitcoin can muster the courage to leap above $80,000 this week-or if it will instead plummet below the $77,500 support zone, leaving a trail of despair in its wake.

Remember that time KBank filed trademark applications for stablecoin tickers in July 2025? Well, they’re back, baby! According to KIPRIS’s database (which is basically the Dewey Decimal System of crypto), these applications are classified into everything from digital currency software to NFT-related shenanigans. Oh, and crypto mining too-because why not?

Galaxy Digital’s stock slid more than 6% in pre-market trading after unveiling a bleak fourth quarter: a net loss of 482 million for Q4 2025, as if the ledgers themselves sighed in despair.

But fear not, dear traders! The higher timeframe price charts are whispering sweet nothings into our ears, suggesting that perhaps, just perhaps, this is an opportune moment for a cheeky purchase. How delightful!

But fear not, dear reader, for the analysts-those modern-day soothsayers with spreadsheets-are here to assure us that Ethereum is just biding its time. Like a cat pretending to ignore you before it pounces on your face at 3 a.m. Yes, the long-term structure, they say, is as bullish as a bull in a china shop. Or a bull market. You get the idea.

So it happens that the guardians of stability, in their patient arithmetic, declare that USDT and Tether Gold now walk the corridors of Opera’s MiniPay wallet. The wallet, born of a system called Celo, is a self-sufficient little machine that pretends to forget nothing and to trust nothing but the user’s human hand. It sits within the Opera browser, a modest throne for coins to rest upon while the world spins with the rhythm of chance. One might smile at the audacity: a coin that never surrenders to panic, a wallet that needs merely a phone number to awaken, as if a man’s life could be simplified to a digit and a breath.

Instead of fleeing, investors are doing that thing where you rearrange the deck chairs on the Titanic but with more spreadsheets. Liquidity’s still here, but it’s pickier than a vegan at a barbecue. Projects built on hype alone are disappearing faster than a magician’s assistant, while weird niche ideas are suddenly getting second glances. Which brings us to Bitcoin Hyper-a project so confidently named it’s like calling your dog “Dog” but with a PhD in existential dread.

President Trump, ever the master of the vague, has denied any knowledge of the $500 million deal involving his family and an Abu Dhabi royal. He told reporters, “I don’t know about it,” which is either a remarkable feat of amnesia or a testament to the efficiency of family-run enterprises where everyone’s in on the secret.

VIRTUAL’s market cap is $422.27M – because nothing says “trust me, I’m a startup” like a number that’s probably just a guess. The token’s 24h volatility? A thrilling 2.0% – just enough to keep you on the edge of your seat.