Crypto news

If you’re a fan of big words and even bigger ambitions, saddle up! They’re laying out plans for fancier barns, slicker processing contraptions, logistics that’d make any hopeless dreamer weep, and irrigation upgrades that could drown a cactus. Even almond orchards-those fickle trees!-are looking to march from 400 to 500 hectares strong, multiplying like rabbits on romance novels. On top of that, they’re dabbling in warehouses where you’ll need a coat in July and micro-irrigation schemes so precise, I bet even Mother Nature would ask for the blueprint.

Turns out, Heritage Distilling, no, not your local booze joint, but some Nasdaq-listed fancy pants company, announced they’re making the “first of many steps” to mess around with their treasury – aka their piggy bank – by loading it up with this token. Because why not? Traders on-chain and all the technical mumbo jumbo are snapping it up like it’s the latest iPhone release, so maybe this thing actually has legs.

So, Stellar [XLM] has decided to go bullish on the SuperTrend indicator for the first time since the 25th of August. Big deal, you say? Well, it’s like your cat finally deciding to use the litter box instead of your favorite shoe. Progress, people! 🐱👟

This whole saga began back in June 2025 when Avalon casually deposited 1.88 million USDT into Bybit (because why not?). They repurchased 13.95 million AVL tokens at an average of $0.1347 per coin and then-wait for it-permanently burned them. Poof! Gone. Like that leftover pizza you swore you’d eat tomorrow but somehow vanished overnight. 🍕✨

According to the old wise scrolls of crypto.news, Sushi (SUSHI) was trading at a rather splendid $0.79, up 2% just yesterday, and flexing a 6.3% gain across the past seven days. Its market cap stood modestly at $153 million-at least for now.

According to Reuters, Nasdaq is shelling out $50 million for a front-row seat at Gemini’s IPO, which is scheduled for September 12, 2025. That’s just in time for everyone to forget what crypto is by 2030. The twins, now calling their operation “Gemini Space Station Inc.,” are selling 16.7 million shares between $17 and $19. Because nothing says “trust us” like a price range that’s basically a guess. 🤷♂️

They say the whole crypto shebang is havin’ a bit of a come-up, pushin’ close to four trillion dollars. Bitcoin’s still the big dog, holdin’ more than half of that, which is somethin’, I reckon, for somethin’ that ain’t got no weight to it. But these flows, like water in the desert, they can dry up quick. And when they do… well, let’s just say it ain’t pretty. 🤔

Dogecoin [DOGE] is about to have a Wall Street moment so absurd it’ll make a banana stand owner weep. With the first DOGE ETF looking set to launch and approval odds soaring like a rocket fueled by memes, traders may face volatility so wild it’ll make a rollercoaster blush.

The Ethereum

ETH
$4 287

24h volatility:
0.4%

Market cap:
$517.33 B

Vol. 24h:
$27.85 B

treasury company, which holds $3.6 billion in ETH with zero debt (because why pay interest when you can just sit on crypto and hope?), claims its stock is undervalued. Co-CEO Joseph Chalom, whose name now rhymes with “Chalo-mania,” insisted that buying back shares is “immediately accretive” to shareholders. Translation: We’re throwing money at this problem until it dies. 💸

As Paxos, Frax, Agora, and even the very architects of Hyperliquid themselves converge, the community is left to ponder the ultimate enigma: who shall steer the course of this stablecoin’s destiny? 🧠