Crypto.com’s CEO, Kris Marszalek, confirmed the news, probably while sipping a celebratory drink that may or may not have been a piña colada. He stated that the firm had successfully navigated the regulatory scrutiny, which is a fancy way of saying they dodged a bullet that was never really fired in the first place.
As of today, Shiba Inu’s price trades at a modest $0.0000133, following a 5% decline in a mere 24 hours – a trifling setback, really, in the grand tapestry of crypto market whims. This slight downturn, of course, was precipitated by the US PCE inflation data for February, which arrived with all the subtlety of a surprise party. 🎉
As the village elder, Analystius the Wise, decreed: “Beware, dear XRP, for if thou breakest below the support level, a plummet of 40% may ensue, leaving thee gasping at the paltry sum of $1.32, a far cry from thy current lofty perch of $2.17.” 😱
“By the time gold hits $5,000,” he declared, “they’ll be riding Bitcoin down to $10,000! A 95% drop from its peak! Can you imagine the tears?!” 💸😂
ETHBTC made fresh lows 0.02210
ether is down 74% against bitcoin since switching from proof of work to proof of stake
Grayscale has taken the plunge, officially filing with the US SEC to unleash an Avalanche upon the unsuspecting public. This bold move follows Nasdaq’s 19b-4 filing, a bureaucratic ballet that will determine whether this ETF gets the green light or is sent back to the drawing board. The SEC, with its usual air of mystery, will decide if this fund is worthy of the public’s attention—or if it’s just another mirage in the desert of finance.
Ah, les amis, it seems the past week was a bit of a snooze fest, n’est-ce pas? No fireworks, no drama, just the gentle hum of the cryptocurrency market. But fear not, for there are still some juicy tidbits to discuss.
Now, let’s talk about “Project Ensemble.” Sounds fancy, right? This is part of the Hong Kong Monetary Authority’s grand plan to tokenize real-world assets. It’s like a sandbox for grown-ups, where we get to play with blockchain and Web3 technologies! Who knew finance could be this much fun? 🏖️
2025, a year already marred by historic exploits, saw the DeFi sector grappling with oversight and security issues. North Korean hackers, those modern-day pirates, made off with $1.4 billion in the Bybit hack. But the JELLY incident? Oh, that was a masterpiece of its own. A whale, exploiting Hyperliquid’s liquidation parameters, swam away with millions, leaving the industry in shambles. 🐋💸
Alas, down over 3% on the day, the pair found itself in a precarious dance, dipping below $84,500 on Bitstamp, a low not witnessed since the fateful day of March 23. 😱
