Crypto News

Filed on Mar. 27, the Strategic Digital Assets Reserve Act, a bill so audacious it makes you wonder if the legislators had been swigging mint juleps a tad too liberally, seeks to give the state treasurer the authority to hold Bitcoin and other digital assets. According to the bill, inflation has been as friendly to the state’s coffers as a viper in a henhouse. The purchasing power of retirement funds and state-managed assets has taken a hit, and the state wants to do something about it. 🐍 хозяйство

Hyperliquid: For users holding long JELLY positions at settlement, the Foundation will compensate them at a price of 0.037555. Hyperliquid will strengthen risk management: HLP will set limits on the Liquidator vault; if losses exceed the limit, ADL will be triggered; the open…

Trump nominated Atkins in December 2024, and until he’s confirmed, Mark Uyeda is holding down the fort as acting chair. (Spoiler: Uyeda’s probably binge-watching Netflix while he can.)

In a blog post that probably had a few backflips, Crypto.com announced the big news on Mar. 27. Remember that Wells notice they got? And then they sued the SEC in October 2024? Yeah, that lawsuit got tossed out like yesterday’s leftovers in December. And now, the investigation is over. No harm, no foul. 🚫🏆

Move over, Academy Awards; Binance has just dropped the curtain on its inaugural ‘Vote to List’ shindig, revealing four lucky tokens that will now bask in the glory of trading on its platform. The big reveal happened on March 27, and these fresh tokens will be available for trading at the stroke of 21:00 UTC. It’s like a crypto Cinderella story, but instead of a pumpkin, we’ve got tokens!

According to the keen eyes of Santiment, the market intelligence platform that keeps its ears to the ground and its nose in the digital winds, these topics have become the darlings of the crypto world’s gossip columns. And who can blame them? In a world where the value of assets can change faster than the plot of a Russian novel, such discussions provide a lifeline of sorts, a beacon in the tumultuous sea of digital finance.

According to The Dark Web Informer (because of course, there’s a blog for this), a user named AKM69 (real subtle, buddy) is peddling 100,000 records of Gemini users. That’s right, 100,000 people’s full names, emails, phone numbers, and location data are up for grabs. And by “grabs,” I mean “sale.” Because nothing says “cybersecurity” like a bargain bin of your private info. 🛒

But lo! The choices presented to our beleaguered users are as scant as a magician’s rabbit after a particularly poor performance. The management, in their infinite wisdom, has issued a warning: reject the restructuring proposal, and you may find your funds suspended indefinitely—like a bad joke that just won’t land, stuck for over nine months. Who knew that crypto could be so… suspenseful?

They’re saying this partnership will make cross-border payments faster, cheaper, and more reliable. Which, let’s be honest, sounds like a miracle in the world of international money transfers—you know, the ones that make you feel like you’re sending a letter by horseback. 🐎

As Circle’s sagely blog proclaimed on the 27th of March, the demand for stablecoins has been rising, defying the capricious whims of the market. Like a sturdy oak, stablecoins have found a strong product-market fit in both the rarefied realm of web3 and the more mundane expanse of traditional finance. Alas, many a company has struggled to set up stablecoin transactions, thwarted by the very barriers USDCKit now promises to dismantle. 🌳