According to the folks at TradingView, GameStop (GME) saw a staggering 30.85 million shares sold short on March 27. It’s like everyone and their grandmother decided to bet against the company overnight!
The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) has outdone itself once again, reclaiming a hefty sum of $8 million after a Kansas bank took a nosedive worthy of a synchronized swimming championship. The unfortunate institution, Heartland Tri-State Bank (or “Heartbreak Hotel” for its devastated investors), found itself at the mercy of a scam that was slicker than butter on a hot skillet.
It attempted a rather pathetic upward move, only to test the 50% Fib retracement level. A truly embarrassing display! Honestly, the sheer lack of elegance is appalling! 😒
But hey, don’t lose your crypto-cool just yet! This chart wizard sees the recent ups and downs as a big ol’ consolidation phase. And guess what? They still think we’re heading to the moon—well, at least to $0.4. 🌕
In a spectacle that would make P. T. Barnum proud, the esteemed duo took to the DC Blockchain Summit stage, their words as weighty as the blockchain’s potential. 🎪 They sang a harmonious tune of regulatory reform, aiming to weave a tapestry of innovation right here on Uncle Sam’s front lawn. 🇺🇸
It seems the good senator from Louisiana has grown weary of the SEC’s apparent lethargy in the face of potential scholarly mischief. “Every committee appearance,” he declared with a gleam in his eye, “shall be a dance of shadows and questions!”
Ripple (XRP), like a phoenix rising from the ashes, showed its might with notable gains, all thanks to the SEC’s benevolent wave of a wand, dropping charges like hot potatoes. 🐣
Binance, the crypto exchange that’s always full of surprises, has officially released the results of its Vote To List program. And guess what? The top four projects are as random as a cat walking on a keyboard. 🐱⌨️ The winners are CZ’s Dog (BROCCOLI), Banana For Scale (BANANA), Tutorial (TUT), and Mubarak (MUBARAK). These tokens will now move from Binance Alpha to the Spot Market, where they’ll either soar to the moon or crash and burn. 🚀🔥
Apparently, by integrating USDT0 into the Superchain, Tether thinks they’re
going to leverage this “growing distribution network” of Ethereum scaling
solutions. Superchain. What is this, a kids’ cartoon? It’s a “network of
networks,” or so they say. Using the OP technical launchpad to share
security, standards, and incentives. Incentives? Sounds like a bribe to me.
It currently accounts for nearly half of all Ethereum Layer 2 transactions
and is widely adopted by companies like Coinbase, Kraken, Uniswap, Zora, and
even major corporations like Sony. Sony? What do they need with crypto?! 🤦♂️
As traders frolicked in the sun-drenched meadows of low-cap altcoins and memecoins (because, why not? 🤷♂️), Ethereum (ETH) stood steadfast, a beacon of hope above the $2,000 threshold. A brief, yet dramatic, 4% tumble on Thursday only served to underscore the market’s unyielding enthusiasm.
