Chainlink’s “Chainlink Runtime Environment” (aka CRE) is now playing nice with Swift’s messaging. Basically, banks can now use their ancient, dusty infrastructure to talk to blockchains. It’s like giving your grandma a smartphone but telling her it’s “just like the rotary phone.” 📱🚀
Mert of Helius, that prophet of blockchain’s end-times, declared, “The stablecoin wars on Solana are about to heat up.” Ah, yes, because nothing says “peaceful coexistence” like issuers hoarding yield like Scrooge McDuck in a liquidity pool. But fear not! Mert promises the dawn of a new age where users, not backroom deal-makers, will feast. Or so he says… 🤷♂️
Notwithstanding this trifling weakness for the nonce, the wise council of analysts points to technical portents that might, with a proper turn of fate, herald further advances. 🤔
In the annals of 2017, XLM performed a prolonged sideways minuet before bursting into a parabolic frenzy, multiplying its price with the audacity of a con artist at a high-society gala. Sistine Research, ever the dramatist, overlays the present chart with such flair that one might mistake it for a Renaissance fresco. The setup, they claim, mirrors those halcyon days before the last rally-a narrative so tantalizing, it’s almost *too* convenient. 🖼️🤔
“XRP offers speed, efficiency, and proven value in global payments,” declared Chairman and CEO Ezra Beyman, with the gravitas of a man who’s just discovered fire. 🔥 Meanwhile, the company’s treasury now boasts Bitcoin (BTC), Ethereum (ETH), Cardano (ADA), and the newest addition, XRP. Quite the menagerie of digital assets, though one wonders if they’re collecting them like trading cards or actually planning to use them. 🃏
Onchain sleuths, those modern equivalents of over-curious footmen, spotted something at block height 917053, where Bitfinex’s hot wallet delivered 8,888.8888888 BTC into a purse said to be under Tether’s command. It is not the first time the same numerical talisman has graced this address-the wallet has received multiple visits from the very same number, as if fortune itself were paying a social call with a cheque book shaped like an octopus’s tentacles. 🤡
Inflows into Bitcoin ETFs? A mere $240 million this September! BlackRock, ever the financial alchemists, conjured $260 million from their crypto cauldron in two years. One might call it a *boon*-if one ignores the existential dread of market volatility. 🧙♂️
Yet, alas, the Futures arena remains a gloomy theatre. The mood was decidedly gloomy, with sentiment as bearish as an English fog. The Long/Short Ratio shambled down to 0.92, and shorts-those wretched pessimists-claimed a sullen 52%, placing a heavy velvet curtain on the upside potential. 🎭🐻
Bitcoin’s magic “entity-adjusted dormancy flow” (yeah, fancy words) dipped below 250,000 – historically, that’s when wallets start itching to buy.
Less than a year ago, they did the exact same thing with Google Cloud. Let’s call it… *diversification*. Or maybe they’re just collecting cloud providers like Pokémon. 🎮
