Crypto News

WCT is currently trading at $0.40, which is a lot of money if you’re buying coffee but not so much if you’re buying a Lamborghini. The 24-hour trading volume has skyrocketed by 1700% to over $910 million, which is enough to make even the most seasoned crypto trader raise an eyebrow. Launched on April 15, the project has been making waves with rapid listings on major exchanges like Binance, Crypto.com, Upbit, Kraken, MEXC, Gate.io, KuCoin, OKX, Bybit, and Bithumb. That’s a lot of names to remember, so don’t worry if you can’t.

In the past week, Dogecoin has managed a 4.35% uptick, proving that even memes have their good days. The Bollinger Bands, those theatrical overlords of volatility, suggest that the drama might be dialing down. 📉

This rather frantic surge, you see, is due to investors being in a blue funk over the economic jiggery-pokery. And, of course, those tariff policies of President Trump – a bit of a bind, really. Consequently, the chaps who know about these things (or at least, claim to) are issuing forecasts that are about as clear as mud on how this might influence Bitcoin. 🤔

It’s tried to break higher, bless it, but failed to gain any significant momentum. Probably just needed a nap.😴

Now, pay attention, for this isn’t just any old magic trick. No! This marks a splendid leap forward for Bitwise as they extend their little fingers across the vast European expanse, ready to welcome Bitcoin and Ethereum investors with open arms and cheeky grins.

Chen Shi, a sage from the Zhongnan University of Economics and Law, muses that this practice is a “makeshift solution” — a polite way of saying it’s a bit of a mess. 🎭 He suggests that better oversight is needed, as crypto crimes continue to rise like a phoenix from the ashes of regulation. Guo Zhihao, a legal eagle from Beijing Yingke Law Firm, chimes in, pointing out the glaring conflict between the crypto ban and the need to liquidate seized tokens. It’s as if the left hand doesn’t know what the right hand is doing. 🤷‍♂️

Now, forced to retreat like Gogol’s own Akaky after losing his overcoat, Ethena must return every last USDe token under the ever-watchful eye of BaFin, who no doubt is twirling a bureaucratic monocle. Not content to just shake their heads in disappointment, BaFin slapped down a fine of €600,000 – an amount more than enough to buy a hundred bureaucratic overcoats – and forbade Ethena from receiving payments or selling tokens. This, they claim, is all to protect the creditors’ precious few beans from vanishing altogether. 🚫💰

Hong, who’s clearly been binge-watching Trump’s greatest hits, says he’ll roll back crypto rules faster than you can say “Make Blockchain Great Again.” His goal? To turn blockchain into South Korea’s next big export—right after kimchi and Samsung phones. 🇰🇷📱

Alchemy Pay (ACH), the Singapore-based fiat-crypto payment gateway that’s cooler than a cucumber in a freezer, now has the legal green light to facilitate secure transactions in Arizona. With this shiny new license, they’ve got MTLs in nine U.S. states, including Arkansas, Iowa, and Wyoming. And they’re not stopping there—they’re applying for more licenses like they’re collecting Pokémon cards. Gotta catch ‘em all, right? 🌍

What does this mean for you, the average investor? Glad you asked! If this thing gets approved, you could trade XRP futures just like you’re buying socks at the grocery store—through your regular brokerage account. No fancy crypto wallets or worrying about those weird “keys” that always seem to be lost in the Bermuda Triangle of the internet. It’s like the easy button for getting in on XRP—without actually owning the thing. Genius, right?