This, dear reader, is but a natural consequence of Ether’s recent renaissance-a veritable phoenix rising from the ashes of mediocrity, doubling in price in a mere two months after languishing in the cryptoverse’s equivalent of a Dickensian workhouse.
Oh, what a splendid day at Metaplanet! 🎉 The squirrel-like executives have once again flung themselves into the great Bitcoin nut-stash, gobbling up 1,009 shiny BTC coins (worth a rather dashing $109 million). With this latest spree, their treasure trove now glitters at 20,000 BTC-enough to make a gold-loving dragon weep with envy. 🐉💎 One … Read more
Last week, we got the July PCE inflation report, which-surprise, surprise-did exactly what economists predicted. Inflation ticked up a tiny bit. Shocking! Meanwhile, GDP growth was bumped up from 3% to 3.3%. Big whoop. The economy’s chugging along like your uncle’s ancient car that somehow still runs.
Bitcoin [BTC], the ever-reliable protagonist in our financial drama, clings to key support as the market churns with indecision. Over the past week, it has managed to print two lower lows, with the 25th of August rebound attempt failing to stick. Much like a character in a poorly written play, BTC is struggling to find its next act.
Chainlink [LINK] is poised for a dramatic crescendo. Imagine a market ballet, with nearly 90% of the performers – or should I say, holders – applauding in profit, as the stage of exchange reserves shrinks to a delightful multi-year low. We stand on the brink of a supply concerto!
SHIB has been doing the technical tango inside a symmetrical triangle-imagine a really boring game of “keep away” with support and resistance levels getting closer since July. Currently, it’s like that friend who’s stuck in the middle of a dance floor, uncertain whether to sit down or leap-trapped within the triangle, waiting for that big, dramatic breakout. Interestingly, it’s still respecting its boundaries, which is just a fancy way of saying it hasn’t yet made a fool of itself by breaking out of line. Keep watching-any sudden volume spike or a close above the resistance might turn this sleepy puppy into a fireworks display. 🎆
In the past 24 hours, SEI pirouetted between $0.284 and $0.293, a ballet of bulls and bears, before bowing toward the $0.293 crescendo. A flirtatious spike to $0.292 at 18:00-ah, the drama!-hinted at accumulation so eager, it might’ve blushed. Will it hold above $0.29? Stay tuned, dear reader, for the plot thickens! 🎭
Coinalyze, that oracle of modern finance, informs us that Binance Coin’s futures open interest hovers at $196 million-a number as meaningless as a Tsar’s promise. August 25 and 27 saw “brief upticks in volatility,” they say, as if volatility were not the very air these creatures breathe. Since August 29, the trend has “flattened,” which traders interpret as “consolidation.” In human terms: everyone’s waiting for someone else to burn their fingers first.
Consider Flexjet-owned FXAIR, now accepting tokens for transatlantic jaunts priced at a modest $80,000. Or Virgin Voyages, peddling annual passes for $120,000. SeaDream Yacht Club and The Kessler Collection, too, have joined this crypto carnival, according to the FT. 🌍🚀
This alteration concerns one of the busiest networks in the cryptographical society-an establishment which manages over three million transactions each day and hosts nearly eighty-one billion dollars in Tether’s USDT, the favored stablecoin. The change took effect most promptly at 8 o’clock in the evening-Beijing time-an hour that might suit even a lady’s leisure or a gentleman’s rendezvous. 🌙