Massive exchange outflows usually scream one of three things: long-term accumulation, cold storage shenanigans, or whale herds playing musical chairs. But this time? The negative netflow is so dramatic, it’s practically auditioning for a Shakespearean tragedy. Is it accumulation? Or is it just the universe trolling us with a “Buy the Dip” meme? 🤷♂️
Sure, Trump talks a big game, but does he walk the walk? And Biden, well, he’s like that uncle who doesn’t get memes but somehow ends up winning the lottery. 🍀 When you strip away the political theater (and there’s a lot of it), the numbers tell a spicier story than a Mel Brooks movie. 🌶️
Образно говоря, с начала года эти фонды были как новички в школе – тихо торчали в уголке, не вызывая особого интереса. Но к концу года вдруг обзавелись всеми звездами, как на бала. Но путь туда был как поездка на карусели: вверх, вниз, и туда-сюда, никто не знал, чего ожидать.
Hyperliquid enjoyed a year that could only be described as nothing short of spectacular-like a well-timed pratfall in a comedy show. The decentralized derivatives exchange, it seems, has been on a rocket ship to success, with user activity expanding faster than Bertie Wooster’s waistline after a weekend at Aunt Agatha’s. And, oh dear me, trading volumes reached levels so historic one might think they were being chronicled by a particularly enthusiastic historian!
Solana, that paragon of speed, boasts transactions faster than a Frenchman’s excuse! 🥇 Its upgrades? As quick as a valet’s bow. Tokenized stocks? A $185M spectacle, though Ethereum’s wallet remains far heavier. 🏦
Out of the digital ether, the oracle of social media-Josh Olszewicz-proclaimed with an air of grave seriousness (and perhaps a touch of sarcasm) that the great ascent is nearing its end. Warning of a looming correction, he drooled over the Ichimoku Cloud, which, as any seasoned mystic or gambler knows, is the modern equivalent of gazing into a crystal ball with a hangover.
The latest data from the Treasury International Capital System, a veritable treasure map for financial sleuths, reveals Brazil, China, and India collectively offloading a staggering $28.8 billion in US treasuries. One might imagine them tossing gold coins into a well, except the well is a global market with a penchant for chaos.
The price of Bitcoin (BTC) has fallen by 1% over the last 24 hours. A 1% drop? That’s like a toddler’s tantrum in the crypto world. 🚀📉
So, Ethereum’s future is looking about as bright as a British summer-gray and uncertain. Benjamin Cowen, the man who probably dreams in candlestick charts, recently spilled the tea on the Bankless podcast. 🍵 His verdict? ETH’s 2026 prospects are as shaky as a three-legged stool. 🪑
