“Folks, the problem isn’t that crypto is some wild, untamable beast from the Black Lagoon 🦖,” Atkins proclaimed, adjusting his imaginary cape. “It’s that we’re using laws designed for paper stock certificates and fax machines! The Supreme Court’s 1946 ‘security’ definition was great for its time, but let’s be real-it was written when ‘decentralized’ meant ‘the office coffee machine was broken.’”
The economist, a self-proclaimed prophet of the yellow metal, has once again taken to the digital pulpit, urging the faithful of Bitcoin to abandon their digital idols and flock to the sacred altars of gold. His words, dripping with the honeyed rhetoric of a man who has long since abandoned the modern age, echo through the corridors of social media, where the eternal struggle between innovation and tradition rages on. 🪙
Robert Kiyosaki, the pen behind the ever-popular Rich Dad Poor Dad, a tome so ubiquitous it has graced bookshelves in over 50 languages, remains unshaken in his bullish fervor for bitcoin. Even as the market weeps and wails, he stands firm, declaring the downturn a mere hiccup in the grand symphony of monetary evolution. 🎩✨
The daily chart? A somber descent since breaching $3.05, with price clinging to $2.30 like a moth to a flame. Candle bodies shrink, signaling either indecision or the market’s attempt to build a base while pretending it’s not nervous. Volume spiked on a red candle-capitulation, perhaps? But follow-through? Nowhere to be found. The market yawns. 🤐
According to a Financial Times report (which is almost as shiny as Tether’s reputation), this crypto colossus is in advanced talks to lead an eye-watering €1 billion investment that could catapult Neura’s valuation to between €8 billion and €10 billion. Because what better way to diversify than pouring billions into mechanical humanoids that might someday replace customer service reps or, worse, your annoying family members?
As BTC loses its grip and capitulates with all the flair of a failed acrobat, Ethereum quietly rises like the phoenix-brighter, bolder, and almost funny in its stubbornness. When Bitcoin flops, ETH struts, claiming the throne as the safer, sassier asset in the market melee.
Mow’s got a theory, see? He says the folks hankerin’ after “private as a outhouse at midnight” Bitcoin don’t need to chase no shiny new tokens. Zcash? Pfft. He calls it what it is-a carnival barker’s trick when the real magic’s been under your nose all along.
With the U.S. government’s self-imposed farce concluded, the coming weeks threaten to become a gilded cage of make-or-break reckoning. The market, that capricious jester, teeters on the edge of a precipice, its next move dictated by numbers and narratives that may yet consign it to the abyss.
According to the delightful data, Lighter’s impressive $68 million was the highlight of this week’s funding soiree, set amidst derivatives platforms, gaming ventures, and infrastructure-truly, a portrait of contemporary ambition.
