Crypto news

But numbers are cruel ranch hands; they don’t pat heads, they count teeth. And the teeth-those jagged little Exponential Moving Averages-showed SHIB had slipped under both the 50-day and 100-day fences. The chart itself drew a tired, ironic smirk: a head-and-shoulders pattern, like some poor soul shrugging at fate. Head at $0.00001760, shoulders sagging at $0.000016, neckline drooping to $0.00001027. One slip of the paw below that neckline, and the mutt might tumble clear to $0.000090-yes, another zero for the scrapbook. 🙃

Among the top 100 cryptocurrencies, OKB, KCS, ADA, HYPE, and ARB have danced between 10% and 100% gains in the past seven days. While Bitcoin and Ethereum bask in their bullish glory, whispers of an altcoin season echo through the digital ether-a mid-August spectacle as predictable as it is tantalizing. 🌪️💫

Indeed, DeFi on Stellar is blossoming with the fervor of a spring flower, offering services such as borrowing, lending, staking, tokenization, global wallets, and cross-chain bridges. These tools, akin to a magician’s hat, allow users to manage their finances, earn rewards, and transfer value across the globe-all without the meddling hands of banks or intermediaries. What a time to be alive! 💸

The market, never content to abide in its shackles, began to show signs of unrest. Bitcoin, the czar of cryptocurrencies, watched its dominance slip quietly away – from a proud 65% in May to a more humble 59% by August. Such decline always signals capital rotation, if not the whiff of revolution. An altcoin uprising, perhaps? Or merely the prelude to more chaos, the kind that has a habit of creeping into your cabin at midnight and eating your potatoes. 🥔

Well folks, Google Play has dropped a bombshell this week. If you’re into crypto exchanges or custodial wallets, brace yourself: you’ll need a fancy financial license to keep your app on the Play Store in over 15 major markets. 😲 The U.S., U.K., EU, Japan-basically the entire world-has been caught in the net. No, seriously. If you’re targeting those markets, it’s compliance time!

The milestone comes after it activated its full Markets in Crypto-Assets Regulation (MiCA) license which is sanctioned by the Central Bank of Ireland. The Central Bank of Ireland, because nothing says ‘trust us’ like a bunch of bankers with a spreadsheet and a wink. 🏦

Dragoun, the prosecutor with a surname that sounds like a Balkan folk-dance, issued a small encyclopedia of Chapter-and-Verse charges: Section 216(1) for laundering, 216(4)(b) for creative obscurity, 216(5)(b, c) for stubborn hush-money, and-why stop there-Section 283(1, 4b) for manufacturing paradise powders. Each Latin numeral rang out like a church bell for the Devil’s matins. 🔔

The Bitcoin Policy Institute of India (BPI India) made its grand debut on August 15, 2025, coinciding with the country’s 79th Independence Day. Yes, you read that right-while others were busy eating tricolor sweets, this think tank was busy plotting how to make Bitcoin the next big thing in India. Who needs butter chicken when you can have blockchain, right? 🍛🔗

It was a day like any other, until-bam-reentrancy bug strikes, and $42 million vanishes faster than your favorite snack. GMX, however, played it cool-talked to the hacker, who went from villain to bounty hunter (thanks for the bounty, buddy!). Most of the loot was returned, and a shiny $44 million compensation plan was born. A little “we got this” in the crypto chaos. 🎯

Yep, only Bitmine can still brag louder, on account of holding a smidgen more of them digital corn-cobs. Everybody else is eatin’ SharpLink’s dust and wonderin’ whether the subscription to common sense CoinDesk was worth it.