Crypto news

It probably won’t.)

Let us turn our gaze to the realm of bureaucracy, where Canary Capital, with the solemnity of a priest, files Form 8-A. Eric Balchunas, that modern-day prophet of ETFs, whispers of its inevitability. Yet what does this parchment mean to the soul of XRP? A mere prelude to chaos, or a ritual to appease the gods of speculation? The answer, dear friend, lies in the trembling hands of traders. 📜

The missing ingredient isn’t better tech-it’s a shared sense of “Okay, let’s all follow the same rules for once.” Because nothing kills innovation faster than a compliance-free-for-all.

Crypto whales are steadily buying Aster (ASTER) token despite uncertainty around its sustainability, drawing attention and sparking discussion in the crypto community. Onchain transaction data show that large-scale investors have been increasing their ASTER holdings over the past few days. At the same time, traders are taking more positions in derivatives, even though the token’s long-term outlook remains uncertain. 🐋💸

The mighty Coinbase, that digital colossus straddling the realms of crypto and capitalism, found its Achilles’ heel not in regulators or hackers, but in a humble UK fintech called BVNK. 🏰🇬🇧 Fortune reported that their $2B acquisition tango ended abruptly, like a Tinder date that realizes they’re both swindlers. “Mutual agreement,” they called it-a phrase that means “we both saw the red flags but kept dancing anyway.” 🚩🕺

This move, orchestrated by the US Treasury and the IRS, is anticipated to catapult the mainstream acceptance of proof-of-stake blockchains into the stratosphere of technological adoption. One might say it’s the fiscal equivalent of a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat… except the rabbit is a ledger, and the hat is a regulatory framework. 🧠

Sustained inflows → gradual recovery and new highs. 🚀🤑

Behold, the institution of banking, that ancient titan, now stretching its tentacles into the digital abyss, where transactions zip about like overcaffeinated squirrels. 24/7, a phrase that evokes the eternal vigilance of a sleepless clockwork, yet somehow, the bankers manage to keep their eyes open. ⏳

Speaking to the Financial Times, Sethi spilled the beans: the UK’s regulatory overreach is so severe, users are locked out of 75% of crypto products. DeFi staking and lending? Gone. Like a magician’s trick, but without the magic. 🪄🚫

Bitcoin (BTC), the grand poobah of cryptocurrencies, took a nosedive to an intraday low of $102,461 on Wednesday, Nov. 12. That’s nearly 5% off its Tuesday high of over $107K. This dramatic plunge was a gracious retreat from the rally sparked by U.S. President Donald Trump’s “tariff dividend” remarks, which-surprise, surprise-failed to hold any lasting promise. At the time of writing, BTC had recovered slightly, but still showed a 2% loss over the past 24 hours. Truly inspiring stuff.