Dearest readers, it is with the utmost dismay that we must report on the trials and tribulations of one Mr. Elon Musk and his curious establishment, the X. Alas, the European Union has taken umbrage with his platform’s lack of decorum, and a most unpleasant fine may be in the offing. 🤦♀️ The allegations, my … Read more
Imagine, dear reader, the tale of Mike McGlone, 🕵️♂️ the chief commodities strategist at Bloomberg Intelligence, whose words echo through the cryptosphere like the tolling of an ominous bell. In his latest missives, he proclaims the dire importance of Bitcoin, the world’s premier digital coin, clinging to the lofty heights of $100,000 like a desperate … Read more
Ah, Changpeng Zhao, or CZ as the cool kids call him, is at it again. The Binance cofounder and former CEO has taken a moment to remind us mere mortals about the latest *“game-changing”* news—Binance Labs is rebranding. Because who doesn’t love a good rebrand, right? I mean, it’s not like it was already a … Read more
In the midst of the bustling world of decentralized oracles, one finds the illustrious Chainlink, which has recently captured the fancy of many a discerning investor. Indeed, this token has ascended to the remarkable height of nearly $30 in the month of December in the year 2024, only to experience a rather dramatic descent thereafter. … Read more
In a twist of fate worthy of a Chekhov play, the crypto world’s favorite courtroom drama, Ripple vs. SEC, has just taken another unexpected turn. Our beloved Ripple Labs, ever the master of timing, has decided to extend the agony of this lawsuit until mid-April. Yes, you heard it right, folks! The saga continues, much … Read more
So, Cardano’s Plomin upgrade just cleared some big hurdle. 🎉 Big deal. Intersect tweeted that the Interim Constitutional Committee (ICC) voted unanimously in favor of it. 100% agreement? That’s like finding a parking spot in Manhattan on a Saturday night—rare, but not impossible. Anyway, this is apparently a big step forward for Cardano. I mean, … Read more
Well, well, well, look who’s back in the game! Bulls are strutting their stuff at the end of the week, according to CoinMarketCap. 🐂💃 SOL/USD: The Drama Unfolds Hold onto your hats, folks! The price of Solana (SOL) has shot up by a whopping 9.15% in just 24 hours. I mean, who needs a rollercoaster … Read more
In a most remarkable exhibition of fortitude, the realm of Bitcoin exchange-traded funds (ETFs) has witnessed a trifling succession of inflows over three consecutive days. At the forefront of this financial spectacle stands the illustrious investment firm, BlackRock, with an impressive sum exceeding $150 million. One might say, “Well, isn’t that just delightful!” 😏 BlackRock’s … Read more
Dearest readers, prepare yourselves for a tale of financial intrigue that would make even the most seasoned of Austen’s characters blush! 🤑 The asset known as XRP has been on a veritable rollercoaster ride, leaving us all in a state of breathless anticipation. 🎢 As we gaze upon the charts, we cannot help but wonder: … Read more
In a move that might make some pensioners clutch their pearls (or, more likely, their walkers), Kansas Republican State Senator Craig Bowser has cooked up a scheme involving the great cryptocurrency enigma known as Bitcoin. Senate Bill 34 is his love letter to the idea of taking a big, juicy bite out of public employee … Read more