These dupes were sweet-talked with promises of monthly gains reaching up to 9%, along with bonuses for those who involved others-funded entirely by the new influx of naïve souls. Truly, a pyramid-though not the sort you see in a historic garden, but one constructed by greed and guile.
GemXBT, bless their cryptic hearts, dropped some wisdom on X about DOGE/USDT breaking above $0.2533 with all the conviction of a preacher at Sunday service. This isn’t just any breakout; no sir, this one’s got legs-legs powered by bullish momentum strong enough to make even the most skeptical trader sit up straight. Bulls are taking charge here, flexing muscles and showing off fancy chart patterns like they’re auditioning for a rodeo.
Binance Coin (BNB) recently established an all-time high above $800, but technical signals now point toward potential weakness. The inability to maintain bullish momentum, combined with fading volume, raises the risk of a deviation at the range high and a deeper short-term correction. It’s like trying to keep a party going when everyone’s starting to yawn. 😴🎶
The job listings read like a script from a soap opera-Schwab, for example, is hunting for a senior product manager in crypto trading and another for on-chain adventures. Because who wouldn’t want to helm a ship in the wild sea of Bitcoin and Ether? CryptoMoon reports that Schwab’s chasing after Bitcoin and Ether spot trading, aiming for their grand debut by April 2026-perhaps just in time for the next global economic comedy show.
This sparks the question: Is this rally sustainable, or is a painful reversal just around the corner? The tension is palpable. 😬
It all started when Google Play Store, the benevolent overlord of all things app-related, introduced updated licensing requirements for cryptocurrency wallet apps. This new policy would apply in 15 countries, including major players like the U.S. and the European Union. Developers, understandably, had a bit of a meltdown when they realized that the update demanded new registrations – think FinCEN’s Money Services Business (MSB) status in the U.S. or MiCA licensing in the EU – for all wallet apps, custodial or non-custodial. Because who doesn’t love a little regulatory nightmare? 😬
But lo! This is not merely a tale of financial woe; nay, it follows the recent decree from the noble EU, which, in a fit of righteous indignation, has chosen to sanction two Chinese lenders for their alleged dalliance with Moscow in the realm of cryptocurrency. A scandal most delicious! 🍿
On a perfectly average Wednesday (unless you were one of the hacked), renowned crypto sleuth ZachXBT revealed an exclusive inside peek at the digital misadventures of a North Korean hacker group. This rare glimpse was courtesy of an anonymous whistleblower who did what any daring insider would do-nosed around in their device, probably while muttering, “What’s this button do?”
Here’s the deal: Radiant Capital, this cute little crosschain lending protocol, got hit with a major cybersecurity breach on BNB Chain and Arbitrum. Now, before you start feeling bad for them, just know the hacker turned that sad sack of stolen money into a fat Ether stash. And now, that stash is sitting pretty with 21,957 ETH worth over $103 million. Sweet gig, right? 🤑
But let us pause for a moment, dear reader, and don our detective hats. 🕵️♂️
