Crypto Carnage: Bitcoin’s Existential Crisis 😭🚀

by

Markets

  • Need we say “fear” louder? The Crypto Fear and Greed Index has been a rom-com gone wrong, starring Bitcoin as the ditzy BFF-30% of the past year = 30% of my/spouse’s savings. 😬
  • Currently at a sparkling low of 17-because 17 is clearly the number that screams “I’m purely over here for emotional support, not returns.” 🛑😡
  • Bitcoin’s 30% dip from peak? Let’s just say it’s the crypto version of entering a buzzcut phase in 2009. Regret is optional? Pfft. 😅

Bitcoin clings to $90k like a koala to Eucalyptus, while the Fear and Greed Index moonwalks into “I give up, take my crypto.” 🐰💸

Psycho fears? The index’s 17-point rating isn’t just low-it’s a standing ovation for despair. 🎭📉

Try not to panic when the market’s been yelling “doomsday sale” since October. Bitcoin’s 36% freefall was so dramatic, it deserves an Oscar. 🏆🔥 While cryptos self-sabotage, equities are simping with a 42-point fear score-because stability is just a myth for anyone rich. 💼😱

Across crypto and stocks? Fear’s ruling like a despotic influencer. Phoned-in strategies, gaslighting rallies, and a collective “help” scream into the void. 📡🙏

The death cross in November? Morbidly perfect. Bitcoin’s $80k rebound was so cringey, it became a meme-worthy comeback. 💔📉🔥 Every death cross since 2023 is like a failed dating profile: “Here, this worked before…”

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2025-12-15 12:54