CZ’s ‘Tiny’ Nudge: UAE Now Swimming in Bitcoin Like It’s the New Oil

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So, Changpeng Zhao (CZ), the guy who basically built Binance in his sleep, decided to drop a little bombshell. Turns out, he’s the reason the UAE is now all cozy with Bitcoin. Yeah, that’s right. The guy who probably has more crypto than you have socks claims he only did a “tiny bit of advocacy.” Sure, CZ, just like I only “tiny bit” overeat at buffets.

In a tweet that’s probably worth more than my entire retirement fund, CZ casually mentioned that the UAE now sees Bitcoin as a store of value, just like gold. Because, you know, who needs jewelry when you can have digital coins? His humblebrag included the phrase, “I might have done a tiny bit of advocacy for this.” Right, just like I might have done a tiny bit of complaining about my neighbor’s loud music. It’s basically the same thing.

CZ’s ‘Tiny’ Influence: UAE Goes Full Crypto

“I might have done a tiny bit of advocacy for this,” CZ said, probably while sipping a $500 coffee in Dubai.

Let’s not forget, CZ moved to Dubai in 2021 because, well, where else would a crypto billionaire live? The city’s pro-crypto vibe must have been too tempting, like a sale at a luxury car dealership. His presence there has apparently turned the UAE into a Bitcoin haven. I mean, if CZ sneezes, the crypto market catches a cold. So, yeah, his “tiny bit” of advocacy probably felt like a hurricane to the UAE’s decision-makers.

Fast forward to today, and the UAE is basically Bitcoin’s new best friend. Abu Dhabi’s royal family, through Citadel Mining, has been digging up Bitcoin like it’s the new oil. They’ve got mining operations on AI Reem Island, which sounds like something out of a sci-fi movie. So far, they’ve racked up over $450 million in Bitcoin. That’s a lot of zeros, even for royalty.

According to Arkham, the UAE has mined $453.6 BTC. And get this-they’re holding onto it like it’s a family heirloom. Their last outflow was four months ago. Meanwhile, they’re sitting on a $344 million profit, minus the energy costs. Because, you know, mining Bitcoin is basically the same as leaving your AC on all summer.

UAE’s Bitcoin Obsession Hits $1B

But wait, there’s more! Two of Abu Dhabi’s sovereign wealth funds, Mubadala and Al Warda, have gone all-in on Bitcoin ETFs. By the end of 2025, they’ve got over $1 billion tied up in BlackRock’s iShares Bitcoin Trust (IBIT). That’s right, $1 billion. I’m pretty sure that’s more than I’ll make in my entire life, but what do I know?

According to some fancy SEC filings, Mubadala owns over 12.7 million shares of IBIT, worth $631 million. Al Warda isn’t far behind with 8.21 million shares, worth $408 million. Even if Bitcoin’s price takes a nosedive, the UAE’s crypto stash is still worth more than my self-esteem after a bad haircut.

So, there you have it. Thanks to CZ’s “tiny bit” of advocacy, the UAE is now a Bitcoin powerhouse. Who needs oil when you’ve got digital gold? And if Bitcoin crashes, well, at least they’ll have a great story to tell at dinner parties. “Remember when we thought Bitcoin was the future? Good times.”

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2026-02-20 20:08