How a Digital Robin Hood and Some Legal Wizards Fixed a $7 Million Crypto Snafu

Well, gather ’round fellow internet explorers, because the decentralized exchange known as Kiloex—recently and spectacularly hacked for a cool $7 million—has just dropped some rather unexpected news. Brace yourselves: all the plundered booty has been returned! 🎉 Yes, like a cybernetic Captain Ahab finally catching his whale, Kiloex announced that every penny is back in the vault.

Apparently, they’ve been huddling with legal eagles and tech whizzes to wrap this tale up tidily, finishing the digital equivalent of “case closed” with not a single victim left crying over lost crypto coins. It’s the cybersecurity fairy tale we didn’t know we needed. 🧚‍♂️

In a surprise twist worthy of a heist movie plotline, the white hat hacker who heroically helped recover the funds is getting a 10% cut of the haul as a reward. That’s right—a bounty of about $700k just for doing the right thing. If this doesn’t convince you that hacking isn’t all doom and gloom, I don’t know what will. 🤠

For those eagerly waiting by their electronic piggy banks, Kiloex promises to keep us posted on the mysterious art of withdrawing these recovered riches via X (because why not keep it cryptic?). And, in the spirit of “nothing left to see here,” the company has said no further legal action will be taken—so feel free to exhale and maybe invest in a new password manager. 🔐

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2025-04-18 19:27