Is the SEC Finally Throwing in the Towel on Coinbase? Ripple, Are You Next?

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In a curious turn of events—one might even call it a stroke of absurdity—the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) has, after what can only be described as an eternity of courtroom battles and bureaucratic nonsense, agreed to dismiss the Coinbase case. Yes, you read that correctly. The great legal behemoth of the SEC, which spends millions of taxpayer dollars on something akin to a never-ending soap opera, has decided to just… give up. The absurdity! Who could have predicted such a twist? 💸

“After what seems like an eternity of litigation, the draining of taxpayer money, and the irreversible chaos inflicted upon the nation, we’ve reached an agreement to let Coinbase off the hook,” said Brian Armstrong, CEO of Coinbase, with a certain smugness in his voice, as if to say, “We told you so.” Perhaps he even chuckled a little. The sheer irony of it all! No fines, no charges, just an eerie silence where once there was a battle. Oh, how the mighty have fallen—into apathy. 👀

And, oh, what joyous news this is for Coinbase, whose shares have risen more than 4% in pre-market trading. What a surprise! But then again, it’s always a good day when you’ve managed to dodge a bullet and walked away without so much as a scratch. Isn’t it a wonder how fortune smiles upon the lucky? Or is it the rich? Perhaps both. 🤑

But wait! The drama doesn’t stop there. Just as the dust begins to settle on this farce, John Reed Stark, a former SEC official (and one assumes, a man who knows a thing or two about disappointment), steps into the spotlight. His prediction? That Ripple‘s case might soon follow Coinbase’s lead and vanish into the ether, dismissed in a similar wave of bureaucratic indifference. It’s a truly tragic comedy, one for the ages, where no one wins, but everyone gets to play their part. 🌐

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2025-02-21 16:25