Is Trump Really Going to Mine Bitcoin? You Won’t Believe This!

So, picture this: the US Department of Defense (yes, the one with all the cool toys) might just be dipping its toes into the wild world of Bitcoin mining. I mean, who needs tanks when you can have a Bitcoin ATM, right? 💰

Why The US Could Start Mining Bitcoin

Our dear friend Michelle Weekley, the Director of Product at Byte Federal (a fancy title for someone who probably knows how to fix a jammed ATM), casually dropped a bombshell on X: “I think the DoD is going to start mining Bitcoin.” And she didn’t just say it; she backed it up with four screenshots. Because nothing screams “trust me” like a screenshot, am I right? 📸

In the first post, Michael Saylor, the guy who’s basically the Bitcoin equivalent of a hoarder, said, “₿ig things are coming.” This was viewed by 4.8 million people. I mean, if you have that many eyes on you, you might as well drop a hint about the DoD mining Bitcoin, right? He’s got nearly 500,000 BTC, so he’s basically the Scrooge McDuck of crypto. 🦆

Then there’s Matthew Pines, who simply said, “The room where it happened.” Very mysterious, Matthew. What room? The one with the snacks? Because I’m in. This guy is the Executive Director of the Bitcoin Policy Institute, which sounds like a place where people sit around and talk about Bitcoin while sipping overpriced coffee. ☕

Next up, David Bailey, who’s like the hype man for Bitcoin, said, “When you think the show is over but it’s really just beginning.” Oh, David, you tease! What’s next? A surprise guest appearance by Bitcoin itself? He’s the CEO of BTC Inc., and he’s the one who convinced Trump to go pro-BTC. So, if anyone can get the DoD on board, it’s him. 🎤

And let’s not forget Jason Lowery, the Space Force officer who thinks Bitcoin is a form of national defense. Because nothing says “security” like a digital currency that can be lost in a hack. He liked Weekley’s post, and she responded with a cheeky “Just saying…” Oh, the drama! 😏

Now, here’s the kicker: Trump just signed an Executive Order for a Strategic Bitcoin Reserve. It’s like a treasure hunt, but instead of gold, we’re looking for Bitcoin. The order says the Secretaries of Treasury and Commerce can come up with budget-neutral strategies for acquiring more Bitcoin. So, mining could be on the table. Or maybe they’ll just start a GoFundMe. Who knows? 🤷‍♀️

But hold your horses! No one has officially confirmed that the DoD is getting into the mining game, and there’s no budget or plan on how this would even work. So, for now, it’s all just speculation and memes. At press time, BTC was trading at $82,467. So, if you’re looking to invest, now might be the time to sell your grandma’s jewelry. 💎

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2025-03-18 12:42