Jack Dorsey’s Block Makes Bitcoin Payments a Reality! 🤑🚀

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Get Ready for Lightning-fast Bitcoin Payments! Or wait… Will It Ever Feel Fast? 🤔

Block Inc. Logo with Bitcoin

Well, well, well, folks! Hold onto your hats because Block, Inc. (NYSE: XYZ), the popular (and slightly mysterious) tech giant, just announced it’s rolling out Bitcoin payments on its shiny new Square platform. Yes, you heard that right! 🤑

Lightning Network

Using the Lightning Network—no, not the weather one, silly—you’ll be able to accept Bitcoin payments faster than you can say, “Is this just a phase?” Merchants will be able to take Bitcoin right through their fancy hardware. Who needs cash anyway? It’s so… last century. 💸⚡

2025 rollout timeline

Mark your calendars! The rollout kicks off in the second half of 2025 (that’s the back half, so don’t get your hopes up too early!). By 2026, every eligible Square seller should be jamming Bitcoin payments in their shops—pending regulators, of course. Because what could possibly go wrong? 🤷‍♂️

This isn’t Square’s first rodeo with Bitcoin—last year, they launched a nifty feature allowing merchants to convert a slice of their sales into Bitcoin. Because who doesn’t want a little digital gold in their register? 🏆

Miles Suter, the Bitcoin Guru at Block, claims this move is all about empowering small businesses with more payment options and, hopefully, fewer customer complaints about slow cash register lines. Plus, their ecosystem continues to grow with the Bitkey self-custody wallet (ooh, fancy!) and Proto Bitcoin mining gear. Because if you’re not mining Bitcoin, are you even trying? 💻⛏️

Bitcoin Fun

So, buckle up, Bitcoin believers! The future is here—whether it zooms by at Lightning speed or just drags its feet. Either way, it’s gonna be a wild, digital ride! 🎢

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2025-05-28 11:57