Larry David’s Bitcoin Shenanigans 😜

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Larry David’s Bitcoin Shenanigans 😜

Larry David’s Bitcoin Shenanigans 😜

So, this whole Bitcoin thing, right? It’s like, the Donald Trump administration is gonna make America the crypto capital of the world. It’s like, “We’re gonna buy all the Bitcoin!” They’re gonna have this big “Strategic Bitcoin Reserve,” which, by the way, sounds ridiculous. I mean, who even came up with that name? It’s like something out of a bad sci-fi movie. 👽

And they’re saying this Senator Lummis, whatever her name is, she’s like, “Yeah, we’re gonna do it!” She’s got this new job, head of some “Digital Assets Subcommittee.” I’m pretty sure that’s a real thing, but it sounds like a made-up thing. It’s like something they’d come up with on “Veep,” except, like, ten times more ridiculous.

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Then there’s this Binance guy, Changpeng Zhao, he’s like, “Yeah, it’s happening! It’s happening! The Strategic Bitcoin Reserve, it’s confirmed!” He’s got a little smirk on his face, like he’s about to pull a fast one on someone. And he’s talking about “crypto speed,” which, by the way, sounds like it’s supposed to be a good thing. But, like, “Crypto speed?” Isn’t that just the speed at which people lose their money? 😂

Senator Lummis, she’s all about it, too. She’s like, “There’s a BIG lift ahead!” I’m pretty sure she means “big lift” as in, “lifting the whole thing and throwing it in the trash.” But maybe she’s just trying to sound optimistic.

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And then there’s this Dennis Porter guy, he’s some Bitcoin guru, I guess. He’s saying this is like a “huge step forward.” He’s acting like it’s some kind of victory for America. But, come on, it’s Bitcoin! It’s like buying up all the beanie babies. It’s bound to crash! And when it does, I hope they all get their “huge step forward” straight to the unemployment line! 😂

HUGE: Senator Lummis has just been appointed chair of the Senate’s new Digital Asset Subcommittee. This is a huge step forward for the Senator’s ability to move meaningful legislation forward, including the Strategic Bitcoin Reserve!

— Dennis Porter (@Dennis_Porter_) January 23, 2025

And, of course, Trump’s in on it. He’s like, “We’re gonna make America the crypto capital!” He’s so excited about Bitcoin. He’s like a kid with a new toy, except, like, the toy is worth billions of dollars and could potentially destroy the entire world economy. What could possibly go wrong? 🤔

But, hey, maybe I’m just being a grumpy old man. Maybe this Bitcoin thing is gonna be the next big thing. But I wouldn’t bet my life on it. Just sayin’. 😉

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2025-01-23 22:44