In the grand theater of corporate affairs, a curious proposal emerged from the hallowed halls of the National Center for Public Policy Research, a bastion of conservative thought. This proposal, however, was destined to be cast aside, much like a forgotten fry at the bottom of a takeout bag, as it failed to secure a place on the agenda of the upcoming shareholder meeting of the illustrious McDonald’s.
The Think Tank’s Bold Proposition
With the audacity of a child demanding a second dessert, the think tank urged the fast-food titan to consider the merits of Bitcoin over the more traditional and, dare I say, mundane real estate holdings. They argued, with the fervor of a preacher at a revival, that this digital currency possessed a potential for appreciation and liquidity that could make even the most seasoned investor weep with joy. They invoked the words of the venerable Harry Sonneborn, a former president of McDonald’s, who famously declared that the company was “not in the hamburger business” but rather “in the real estate business.”
Thus, the think tank posited that if McDonald’s truly aspired to long-term capital appreciation, it ought to embrace Bitcoin as it has historically embraced real estate — as a strategic reserve, akin to a secret stash of ketchup packets.
“More companies are adopting Bitcoin as a treasury asset,” the group warned, with a tone that suggested impending doom. “If McDonald’s doesn’t keep up, it could fall behind its peers.”
The SEC’s Verdict: A Side of Reluctance
Yet, in a twist worthy of a soap opera, McDonald’s management, perhaps with a collective shrug, decided to seek the counsel of the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC). They requested permission to exclude this audacious proposal from their shareholder agenda, and lo and behold, the SEC, in its infinite wisdom, acquiesced. They deemed the matter to be a routine business operation, unworthy of the shareholders’ precious time.
This ruling, akin to a referee’s whistle at a football match, effectively silenced the proposal, ensuring it would not grace the discussions of the 2025 shareholder meeting. And so, the saga of McDonald’s and Bitcoin continues, leaving us to ponder: will the golden arches ever embrace the digital age, or will they remain steadfast in their traditional ways, like a stubborn old man refusing to learn how to use a smartphone? 🍔💰
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2025-04-14 18:06