Well, Alpen Labs has gone and done it: they’ve birthed the bitcoin dollar (BTD), a stablecoin with an actual backbone—collateralized by bitcoin, propped up on zero-knowledge rollups, and allegedly so censorship-resistant you could shout rude words at it and it wouldn’t flinch. 🍸💸
Rollups, Minting, and a Stablecoin That Won’t Text Back
BTD is basically an over-collateralized stablecoin, but with less “maybe we’ll rug you” energy. It only trusts good ol’ BTC, not that flighty “promises fulfilled by corporate admins” nonsense. It lives—quite dramatically—on the Alpen Labs’ ZK rollup. Imagine scaling Bitcoin with zero-knowledge proofs: trust issues? Not here. Well, not unless you count trusting maths. Don’t make it weird.
And because one protocol wasn’t enough, enter Liquity V2. Users can mint BTD using their stashed BTC as collateral—no governance tokens, no upgradeable code, and definitely no shadowy DAO member who’s also your ex’s new lover. Smart contracts are frozen from day one: Alpen’s code has more commitment than most of my Tinder matches.
Speculation tokens? Not here, darling. Middlemen? Banished. But—just a tiny plot twist—there’s still a reliance on third-party oracles for BTC/USD data. Alpen’s solution? Throw a bunch of oracles at the problem and hope nobody lies or gets divorced. That’s decentralization, baby!
Want to have a fling with BTD before everyone else? Developers (and commitment-phobes) can play in Alpen’s imminent testnet, tinkering with decentralized lending, trading, and whatever rebellious financial shenanigans they can dream up. Yes, the testnet is also flirting with Taproot Assets and Fedimints, because why not?
David Seroy, Alpen Labs’ Head of Ecosystem and apparently Chief Dramatic Quoter, insists Bitcoin “deserves” BTD—like it’s the main character in an underfunded romantic comedy. He calls it the “foundation for a truly free financial system.” But don’t worry, BTD knows what it’s worth and doesn’t need your validation. 🚀🤷♀️
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2025-05-08 18:33