Metaplanet’s $5.4B Bitcoin Dream: Will They Rent or Own the Satoshi? 🚀💸

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Well, strap in. Metaplanet’s throwing down a cool $5.4 billion — yes, billion — in a move they call the “555 Million Plan.” Because apparently, numbering things makes it sound less crazy, right? They’re issuing 555 million new shares, which, let’s be honest, is more than the population of some small countries. That’s 92.4% of their total shares, so basically, they’re giving away the entire cake and keeping the crumbs. 🍰

These beauties will be offered through Japan’s version of “You can buy a little bit today, a little bit tomorrow” — fancy talk: moving strike warrants. Basically, they’re selling bits of stock over two years to avoid making Bitcoin look more volatile than a toddler on sugar. Because why not make everything slightly confusing? 🤯

EVO FUND is already rubbing its hands together as the lucky recipient, with Evolution Japan Securities playing the role of the cool, behind-the-scenes deal-maker. It’s like a tango, but with stocks and lots of money.

The plan? Oh, just some casual expansion of Metaplanet’s Bitcoin obsession:

  • 30,000 BTC by the end of 2025 (up from a measly 10,000, because why not quadruple it?)
  • 100,000 BTC by 2026 (a little more realistic, right?)
  • 210,000 BTC by 2027—yes, over 1% of all Bitcoin out there—if they achieve their wildest dreams. Or fantasies. Or both.

To make this happen, they’re mixing and matching everything including warrants, bonds, preferred shares, and the good old-fashioned debt. Basically, throwing everything but the kitchen sink at it. Because who doesn’t love a good financial salad? 🥗

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2025-06-06 13:25