Michael Saylor: Crypto King or Too Much Coin for Comfort? 🤔

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Picture this: the tireless, ever-enthusiastic Michael Saylor, maestro of Strategy (remember when they were just boring old MicroStrategy?), triumphantly tweeting about his latest financial maneuver. The man has successfully wrangled a staggering $2 billion from investors, all to fuel his relentless Bitcoin obsession. Don’t put away your popcorn just yet. 🍿

$2 Billion to HODL the Dream 💸

Ah, yes, the pièce de résistance: a 0% convertible senior notes deal that’s set to expire in the charming springtime of 2030. These notes weren’t just for anyone, mind you. No, they were offered exclusively to those magical beings legally deemed “qualified institutional buyers.” Because why would the common folk get a slice of the moon-cake?

“Strategy has completed a $2 billion offering of convertible notes at 0% coupon and 35% premium, with an implied strike price of ~$433.43. $MSTR”

— Michael Saylor⚡️ (@saylor) February 24, 2025

Now, here’s the cherry on top: early birds got not just the worm but the whole buffet! A lucky few were granted the option to scoop up an additional $300 million in notes within a mere five days of issuance. A limited-time offer, like a Black Friday sale without the angry mobs—or maybe with them. 🛍️

And for those who want to play the long game, these notes will mature on March 1, 2030. But wait! There’s more! Starting December 3, 2029, note holders can transform their magical papers into cash and MSTR Class A common shares, like some kind of alchemical ritual at Strategy’s discretion. 🧙‍♂️✨

When all was said and done, the net proceeds tallied up to $1.99 billion—just shy of the headline number. After deducting fees and expenses (because capitalism), the company plans to embark on its mission to scoop up yet more Bitcoin. Because who needs diversification when you have digital gold? 📈🏴‍☠️

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2025-02-24 16:25