Michael Saylor, the man who once declared he’d “hold Bitcoin forever” with the same fervor as a toddler clutching their favorite teddy bear, might be facing a bit of a pickle. 🧸💎 According to a recent SEC filing, Strategy, the company Saylor helms, might have to part ways with some—or all—of its beloved Bitcoin stash. Yes, forever might be shorter than expected.
The filing, written in the kind of legalese that makes you want to take a nap, warns that a “significant decrease in the market value of our bitcoin holdings could adversely affect our ability to satisfy our financial obligations.” Translation: if Bitcoin tanks, Strategy might have to sell some shiny digital coins to pay the bills. And no, they probably won’t be happy about it. 😬
“We may be required to sell bitcoin to satisfy our financial obligations,” the document states, adding that such a sale would likely be “at prices below our cost basis or that are otherwise unfavorable.” In other words, they’d be selling at a loss, which is about as fun as stepping on a Lego barefoot. 🦶🧱
But hey, selling Bitcoin doesn’t mean it’s gone forever. In 2022, rumors swirled that MicroStrategy faced a margin call and had to sell some BTC, but Saylor denied it faster than you can say “HODL.” So, who knows? Maybe this is just a temporary breakup, like Ross and Rachel. 🛋️💔
As of March 31, Strategy, under Saylor’s leadership, announced yet another massive Bitcoin purchase—22,048 BTC worth $1.91 billion. That’s right, they’re still buying like it’s Black Friday at the Bitcoin store. 🛒💰 Currently, the company holds a jaw-dropping 582,185 Bitcoins, valued at a cool $46,527,939,929. That’s enough Bitcoin to make Scrooge McDuck jealous. 🦆💸
At the time of writing, Bitcoin is trading at $79,870 per coin, after a wild weekend that saw it crash nearly 10% and then bounce back 8%. It’s like watching a rollercoaster designed by someone who’s had too much coffee. ☕🎢
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2025-04-08 15:43