PARDON ME? FTX’s SBF Tries to Woo Trump with Backhanded Compliments

PARDON ME? FTX’s SBF Tries to Woo Trump with Backhanded Compliments

PARDON ME? FTX’s SBF Tries to Woo Trump with Backhanded Compliments

Oh, the desperation of the damned! FTX’s co-founder Sam Bankman-Fried (SBF) is at it again, trying to ingratiate himself with the great and powerful Donald Trump in a last-ditch effort to secure a presidential pardon. Because, you know, being convicted of fraud and misappropriating customers’ funds is just a minor setback, really.

SBF’s Desperate Dance with Trump

In a recent interview with the New York Sun, SBF attempted to curry favor with Trump by trashing the Democratic party and Biden’s administration. Because, you see, that’s exactly what you do when you’re trying to get on someone’s good side: you trash their enemies. It’s like a game of musical chairs, but with insults and backhanded compliments.

SBF claimed to be “frustrated and disappointed” with the Democratic party, which is rich, considering he was one of their biggest donors before his little “incident” with the law. But hey, who needs integrity when you’re trying to get a pardon, am I right?

He also tried to butter up Trump by expressing support for Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency (D.O.G.E), because who doesn’t love a good acronym? SBF even suggested that some government programs might need a 30-70% cut, because, you know, efficiency is key. Except when it comes to his own bank account, of course.

And, in a classic move, SBF maintained his innocence, claiming that he doesn’t think anyone was guilty in the whole FTX debacle. Because, you know, it’s always someone else’s fault. ๐Ÿ™„

But wait, there’s more! Before this interview, SBF’s parents were already trying to get Trump’s attention with a personal appeal. Because, you know, nothing says “I’m a good person” like having your parents beg for you.

SBF’s Parting Shots at Biden’s Judiciary

SBF also took a swipe at Judge Lewis Kaplan, the judge who presided over his case, and the Department of Justice under Biden’s administration. Because, you know, it’s always someone else’s fault. He lamented the “politicization of the DOJ over the last decades,” which is rich, considering he’s trying to politicize his own case.

And, in a clever move, SBF tried to appeal to Trump’s sense of grievance by mentioning that they both had it out for Judge Kaplan. Because, you know, shared enemies make for great friendships.

SBF even filed an appeal last year, claiming that Judge Kaplan was biased against him. Because, you know, it’s always the judge’s fault. ๐Ÿ™„

And so, the game of musical chairs continues. Will SBF get his pardon? Only time (and Trump’s mood) will tell. ๐Ÿค”

Read More

2025-02-23 17:43