- Bitcoin laughed in the face of $87k, shrugging off global skepticism like a cowboy at a saloon.
- Russia and China’s crypto antics have everyone wondering if the market’s a circus or a gold rush.
The crypto market, that wild stallion of finance, has kicked up its heels again after a spell of moping in the corner. Bitcoin [BTC], the ringleader of this digital rodeo, has charged ahead, dragging the global crypto market cap to a whopping $2.86 trillion. That’s a 2.86% jump in just 24 hours, according to CoinMarketCap. Not too shabby for a bunch of ones and zeroes.
Bitcoin, which had been butting its head against the $85,000 wall like a stubborn goat, finally broke through, galloping to $87,234.34 with a 3% gain. 🐐💨
Moscow’s Crypto Cold Shoulder
Meanwhile, over in Russia, the Bank of Russia is playing the role of the grumpy sheriff, proposing a ban on cryptocurrency settlements between residents outside their experimental legal regime (ELR).
Not content with just banning, they’re also pushing for penalties on anyone who dares to break the rules. It’s like they’re trying to lasso the Wild West of crypto and turn it into a tidy little pasture.
At a press conference, Elvira Nabiullina, the head of regulators, said,
“We’re sticking to our guns—cryptos shouldn’t be used as payment. So, we’re proposing a ban on crypto settlements between residents outside the EPR. And not just a ban, but penalties for anyone who breaks it.”
Other Countries’ Crypto Conundrums
While Russia’s Central Bank once flirted with the idea of letting “qualified” investors dabble in crypto, they’ve now tightened the reins, proposing stricter controls on crypto settlements.
Their latest idea—a three-year experimental framework for wealthy investors to trade crypto—might just fizzle out like a damp firecracker.
Meanwhile, Japan’s Prime Minister Shigeru Ishiba is side-eyeing the U.S. and other major economies over their opaque Bitcoin reserve strategies. Switzerland and the European Central Bank are also giving crypto the stink eye, wary of its wild ways.
Adding to the chorus of doubt, the Bank of Korea (BOK) recently shot down rumors about adding Bitcoin to its foreign exchange reserves, citing its extreme volatility as a deal-breaker.
This came after an official inquiry by Representative Cha Gyu-geun of the National Assembly, highlighting the ongoing reluctance of traditional financial institutions to embrace Bitcoin.
What’s Next in This Crypto Soap Opera?
China’s alleged liquidation of nearly $20 billion worth of Bitcoin—linked to the 2019 PlusToken Ponzi scheme—has stirred the pot again. Authorities claim the seized BTC was transferred to the national treasury, but the lack of transparency has everyone raising an eyebrow.
And yet, despite Russia’s cautious stance and other nations’ skepticism, Bitcoin keeps on trucking. It’s like the cockroach of finance—resilient, adaptable, and impossible to kill.
Its technical indicators, like the RSI and MACD, suggest the bulls are still in charge, trampling the bears underfoot.

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2025-03-25 08:11