Crypto ETFs, those modern-day alchemists, have stolen the limelight as filings, approvals, and new products sprint like caffeinated hedgehogs. One might think the SEC just handed out golden tickets to Wall Street’s most desperate.
The collision of Wall Street institutions and crypto-native firms is less a revolution and more a chaotic waltz. Investors, meanwhile, clutch their portfolios like nervous debutantes at a stock market ball. The next few weeks? A circus. Let’s dissect the chaos.
Major Players File S-1 Amendments for Spot Solana ETFs
Nate Geraci, president of The ETF Store, recently noted a flurry of S-1 amendments for spot Solana ETFs from Franklin, Fidelity, CoinShares, Bitwise, Grayscale, VanEck, and Canary. One might call it a “relentless march of capitalism,” or as my grandmother would say, “Children, run while you still can.” 🤡
Another flurry of S-1 amendments filed today on spot sol ETFs…
Franklin, Fidelity, CoinShares, Bitwise, Grayscale, VanEck, & Canary.
Includes staking (yes, bodes well for spot eth ETF staking).
Guessing these are approved w/in next two weeks.
– Nate Geraci (@NateGeraci) September 26, 2025
Geraci’s mention of staking components is as subtle as a sledgehammer. For the SEC, this is a “positive sign,” but for the rest of us, it’s a cryptic riddle wrapped in a bureaucratic enigma. Two weeks? More like two seconds if Wall Street’s caffeine intake doubles. ☕💥
Bloomberg’s James Seyffart, ever the optimist, claims issuers and the SEC are “moving things forward.” One wonders if “forward” includes a time machine to 2020, when crypto was still a punchline.
Solana ETFs See Strong Demand
The REX-Osprey Solana Staking ETF, launched in July, is the crypto world’s first “I’ve been here before” moment. Followed swiftly by its Ethereum twin, the industry now has a pair of staking ETFs that could make Warren Buffett blush. 🤕
Bitwise’s Hunter Horsley, ever the hype merchant, boasts that €60 million flooded into the Europe Bitwise Solana Staking ETP this week. One might call it a “bull market,” or as my cat would say, “Finally, something to nap on.” 😸
$60,000,000 into the Europe Bitwise Solana Staking ETP this week –
Solana on people’s minds.
– Hunter Horsley (@HHorsley) September 26, 2025
Cyber Hornet Targets S&P-Crypto ETFs
Cyber Hornet, the financial world’s answer to a caffeinated squirrel, has filed for S&P 500-crypto hybrids. Each fund splits 75/25: 75% S&P 500, 25% crypto. A financial Frankenstein, perhaps? Or as my ex would say, “Why not throw everything into the blender?” 😈
The proposed tickers-EEE, SSS, XXX-read like a stock market’s version of a pop quiz. One wonders if the SEC will approve these or just send a strongly worded letter in Comic Sans. 📜
Breakthrough Month Ahead?
Geraci’s “wild two weeks” sound less like a market update and more like a reality TV show. XRP and Doge ETFs, SEC listing standards, index-based spot ETFs, and a “hype” filing from Bitwise-it’s enough to make a quant analyst retire early. 🧠
Vanguard, that titan of traditional finance, now plans to offer crypto ETFs. A seismic shift? Perhaps. Or just a midlife crisis with a 401(k). Either way, October is now the crypto world’s version of a Russian novel: dramatic, unpredictable, and ending in tears. 🎭
“Get ready for October,” Geraci warns. One might reply, “I’m ready with popcorn, a lawyer, and a therapist.” 🍿⚖️
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2025-09-27 12:22