Coinbase, that most solemn of digital temples, has once again donned its bureaucratic robes to unveil a roadmap so cryptic it could rival the prophecies of Delphi. Two new tokens from the Solana realm-Seeker (SKR) and FIGHT (FIGHT)-now grace its list of “potential” listings, as if the exchange were a fortune-teller scribbling fortunes in chalk and then promptly erasing them.
Behold, the SKR and FIGHT tokens, now etched into Coinbase’s ledger of “maybe tomorrow, maybe never.” Trading? Not yet. Deposits? A death sentence for your funds, should you dare. A warning so stern it makes a bear market seem like a Sunday stroll.
Seeker, that noble token of the Solana Mobile smartphone empire, promises governance and incentives, as if one could govern a device that already forgets your password. FIGHT, with its UFC-inspired bravado, wields its token like a gladiator’s sword, slashing through staking, prediction markets, and fan communities-though at $0.0003172, it’s less “gladiator” and more “pawn in a blockchain chess game.”
Coinbase, ever the patron saint of transparency, now broadcasts its listing whims like a gossiping landlady. Yet one wonders: is this roadmap a beacon of hope or a siren song luring investors into the abyss? Only time will tell, or perhaps only the next market crash.
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2026-01-20 21:22