The Collapse of Bitcoin: Why It Fell Below $75,000 Today? You Won’t Believe It!

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Oh, the sweet irony! Bitcoin, that capricious beauty, has once again plummeted beneath $75,000 for the second time this week. All thanks to Trump’s not-so-subtle 104% tariff on China. Riskier assets, like crypto and equities, have been caught in the crossfire of this diplomatic tantrum, with BTC extending its weekly losses to a truly dramatic 11%. Meanwhile, altcoins, with Ethereum leading the charge, are in freefall—watching the ground approach faster than a skydiver with a broken parachute, down a staggering 25% over the week. 😱

Ah yes, the market. That delightful place where uncertainty reigns supreme. As the two largest economies duke it out in a tariff war, the global markets are trembling. And just when you thought things couldn’t get worse, institutional selling makes its return. BlackRock’s iShares Bitcoin Trust (IBIT), in a move that could only be described as “let’s all panic together,” dumped a cool 3,296 BTC yesterday. This is the third-largest Bitcoin ETF outflow in the history of human error, my friends. Total outflows across all US Bitcoin ETFs? A staggering $326 million. 💸

Now, let’s take a brief stroll through the heart of this classic bull trap. Picture this: Bitcoin skyrockets to $80,400 during a relief rally—only to plummet back down with the grace of a drunken flamingo. Welcome to Trump’s Tariff Wonderland, where relief is brief and losses are relentless. Coinglass tells us that the crypto market liquidations have hit $390 million amidst this spectacular fall. Hold onto your hats, folks. 🎢

Brace Yourself: Is Bitcoin Heading Toward a Global Recession? 🍿

Oh, the sweet, sweet drama of it all. Since the dawn of 2025, Bitcoin has been tumbling like a child’s toy off the edge of a high shelf. With Trump back in the White House, Bitcoin and its digital cousins have taken quite the beating, falling by over 18% year-to-date. Analysts are whispering that Bitcoin could tumble even further, to $70,000—or lower. That’s one hell of a birthday gift, isn’t it?

And if you thought things couldn’t get worse, well, buckle up! If the US stock market continues its slide, we may very well be looking at a full-blown recession. Stocks, bonds, gold, and crypto all collapsing in one big, glorious, financial apocalypse. Enter Peter Schiff, popular economist and master of doom, who noted:

“If Trump’s secret agenda is to crash the stock market to bring down long-term interest rates, the plan already failed. The yield on the 30-year Treasury is now above 4.75%, its highest since February 19th. So the plan to crash the stock market is now crashing the bond market too.”

Will the Fed Jump In With Interest Rate Cuts in May? 🤷‍♂️

As markets around the globe spiral in a panic-fueled waltz, the expectations that the Fed might lower interest rates in May are growing by the minute. We asked the ever-eloquent Global Macro Investor, founder of Real Vision, for his thoughts on this turbulent time:

“This feels a lot like Dec 2018 for those that were around. Powell signaled a pivot. I think we get the same, plus a trade resolution with China. Risk in stocks feels like 10% downside max vs 15% upside in 2 weeks, and 25% upside in a month or two, and much more in 6 months.”

And then there’s BitMEX CEO Arthur Hayes. He too is watching with bated breath, expecting the Fed to intervene soon. Oh, and in case you missed it, he also predicts an influx of Chinese money into Bitcoin if global uncertainty continues to spiral. Lovely, isn’t it?

Hayes recently shared his thoughts in a post that can only be described as “perfectly chaotic.” He pointed out that the Fed is sitting on borrowed time, adding, “The Fed is on the clock, shit is breaking down.” In his words, the current market dynamics are troubling, to say the least. Falling stocks paired with rising yields? That’s not a “good” sign, my friends. In fact, it’s “bad!”

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2025-04-09 07:06