Trump’s Weekend Crypto Rollercoaster: 🤑 Panic to Pump in 48 Hours!

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Oh, the drama! The Trump-China saga has struck again, but this time it’s like a badly timed rom-com-complete with market crashes, crypto rebounds, and Trump’s Truth Social musings. 🍿 Because who doesn’t love a Friday night market meltdown followed by a Sunday morning “it’s all fine” pep talk? 😏

Crypto, as usual, was left holding the bag-or should I say, the blockchain?-as Trump’s Friday announcements once again spared TradFi markets the carnage. Poor Bitcoin and Ethereum, always the first to feel the whiplash. 💔

Trump’s Weekend Magic: From 😱 to 😎 in 48 Hours

By Monday, global markets might be sipping mimosas like nothing happened, while crypto-the 24/7 party animal-has already bounced back. Bitcoin flirted with $115k, and Ethereum reclaimed $4.1k after Trump’s Truth Social therapy session. 🌈 “Don’t worry about China,” he cooed, “it’ll all be fine!” Sure, Donald, sure. 🙄

“Don’t worry about China, it will all be fine! Highly respected President Xi just had a bad moment… The USA wants to help China, not hurt it,” Trump noted. 🦄✨

The timing? Suspiciously convenient. Friday night plunge, just as Wall Street clocked out for the weekend. Crypto markets, ever the workaholics, were left to pick up the pieces. 🕰️

Just In Time. ⏰ – Unicus (@UnicusResearch) October 12, 2025

Fast forward to now, and markets are rebounding like a trampoline. Bitcoin’s at $114,359, and Ethereum’s up 20% from its Friday low. Someone cue the “I Will Survive” remix. 🎶

Sentiment’s flipping faster than a pancake at IHOP, and equities might open Monday like they’ve been meditating all weekend. 🧘♂️ Traders are now convinced Trump’s weekend volatility is a thing-let crypto bleed in private before the S&P 500 wakes up. Sneaky, Donald, sneaky. 🐍

Everyone Friday night: “That dump had nothing to do with Trump.” 👻

Everyone today: “See! Trump fixed it. Time to pump.” 🚀 – ₿rett (@brett_eth) October 12, 2025

The White House chimed in too, with VP JD Vance spilling the tea that Trump’s ready to play nice with China. 🕊️ And officials are whispering, “Markets will calm down this week.” Green light for risk assets? Maybe. Or just more Trumpian theatrics. 🎭

100% Tariff on China by November 1? 🤡

Polymarket bettors are shrugging, giving it an 8% chance. Down from 26% pre-Trump tweet. Looks like everyone’s calling his bluff. 🃏 But for crypto investors, it’s starting to feel like a pattern-Friday crash, Sunday soothe, Monday S&P shrug. Bitcoin’s the only one with emotional whiplash. 😵

Crypto Rover summed it up: “Liquidating everyone just to push prices to new ATHs? Frustrating, but likely.” 😤 And Helius Labs CEO Mert? He called crypto markets Trump’s “social media mood oracle.” Accurate. 🔮

So, is it all orchestrated? Coincidental? Who knows. But one thing’s clear: political theater and crypto are now a match made in meme heaven. 🎪 Trump crashes the market on Friday, calms it by Sunday, and the S&P sleeps through the whole thing. Bitcoin, though? It’s had enough. 🥴

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2025-10-12 20:52