Why the Fed’s Crypto Shenanigans Are the Political Version of a Bad Soap Opera

So, the Federal Reserve recently decided it was time to take back some of its stern warnings about crypto risks, like a parent saying, “Fine, you can have dessert,” but still eyeing you suspiciously. Senator Cynthia Lummis, who’s clearly had enough of this charade, called the whole thing “lip service.” And honestly, can you blame her? 🍿

On April 25, in a move that surprised no one who’s been paying attention, the Fed withdrew its stricter guidance on banks holding crypto assets. But don’t pop the champagne just yet. Lummis dropped a verbal bombshell, accusing the Fed of putting on a show, all sparkle and no substance.

(1/5) The Federal Reserve’s actions yesterday withdrawing crypto guidance are just lip service. Here’s why:

— Senator Cynthia Lummis (@SenLummis) April 25, 2025

Here’s the tea: The Fed still won’t let certain crypto-friendly banks open “master accounts,” which are like VIP backstage passes to the Fed’s payment system. Cryptoland’s Custodia Bank is now suing the Fed for taking forever on its application. Apparently, patience isn’t a virtue when you’re dealing with federal bureaucracy. 🏛️🐢

Plot twist: The Fed kept its anti-Bitcoin handbook

Meanwhile, Senator Lummis points to the infamous “reputation risk” clause—the official way regulators side-eye industries they find distasteful. It’s like being told you can work, but don’t bring your friends along. Oil, weed, and crypto—welcome to the club no one wants to invite you to.

Sure, some federal agencies have stopped wielding “reputation risk” like a blunt instrument, but the Fed? They’re playing hardball. They also held onto their “Bitcoin and friends are unsafe and unsound” policy statement, which feels less like guidance and more like a breakup text. 💔

And for those wondering if the puppet masters have changed, nope! The same folks behind “Operation Chokepoint 2.0”—a government swag name for making life hard on crypto companies during the Biden era—are still calling the shots. You know, the operation that has driven so many crypto players offshore, because apparently, they like the sound of waves over bureaucracy any day. 🏝️

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2025-04-25 22:57