Crypto news

While the firm’s appetite for Ethereum is no secret, their recent staking spree-$340 million in 24 hours!-has left the crypto world clutching their chandeliers in sheer bewilderment. 💰💨

In a missive published most recently (Monday, to be precise), the estimable Fitch Ratings did issue a warning most dire: Bitcoin-backed securities are fraught with peril enough to make even a seasoned financier clutch his pearls. 📜💀

Technical charts, those modern-day tea leaves, whisper of Ethereum’s shadow looming large, while exchange-traded products flutter like moths around the flame of liquidity. Yet, as Tolstoy might sigh: “All markets are alike in their delusions; each crashes in its own way.” 📊

Total crypto market capitalization, now $3.1 trillion, felt the warm breath of CoinMarketCap’s gaze-but sentiment remains as neutral as a politician’s smile. Bulls and bears? Both are currently napping, dreaming of better days. 🛌

The digital space is suddenly calmer for fans of digital chaos. The kind of calm that makes you check the door for a pump-and-dump and find you’ve locked yourself in the exit. 🔒😂

Jerome Powell, that valiant Fed Chair, dropped a bombshell on Sunday with all the subtlety of a slapstick comedian: the Justice Department, in a fit of bureaucratic pique, summoned grand jury subpoenas and waved the specter of criminal charges over his head-over a building renovation, no less! 🏗️⚖️ The man called it “political pressure” with the bluntness of a tavern keeper denying a drunkard another drink: “We set rates for the public good, not to kiss the President’s ring!” 🤭👑

Charles Hoskinson, the founder of Cardano, recently revealed that Midnight protocol will soon integrate Bitcoin and XRP. 🧙♂️✨

Billions flushed down the drain on cybersecurity, yet firms still get pwned by tactics older than the telephone. They hoard firewall trinkets while their employees click on “free Tesla” links. Welcome to the circus of web3, where the lions eat the clowns-and the clowns are holding the keys. 🤡

Bitcoin (BTC) is starting 2026 like a tired mule, refusing to buck the load. On-chain data whispers that long-term holders are slowing their selling, while short-term traders are hugging their coins tighter than a bank vault. It’s the calm before the storm-or maybe just the storm’s nap. 🌪️💤

According to Lookonchain, BlackRock recently transferred over $361 million worth of BTC and ETH, shuttling the cargo to Coinbase Prime, as the transaction details would have you believe 🤷‍♀️.