Crypto’s Tragic Ballet: Will Bitcoin Waltz to $40,000 or Stumble?

Bitcoin Chart from CryptoQuant

In a missive on the platform X, BitQuant observes with a touch of irony that only the indefatigable Saylor’s Strategy dares to embrace Bitcoin at $65,000, while the rest of the world quivers at the specter of a potential U.S. incursion into Iran. The fear, it seems, is that such an event would send Bitcoin tumbling to $50,000, a prospect so dire that wallets remain firmly shut. Ethereum, ever the loyal companion, is expected to follow suit, its fate inextricably tied to its more illustrious counterpart.

Coinbase’s Grand Delusion: Stocks, Crypto, and the Soul of Greed

Coinbase Global Inc. (Nasdaq: COIN), that harbinger of financial hubris, hath flung open its gates to the unwashed masses, offering them 8,000+ stocks to trade alongside their crypto trinkets. On February 24, this digital Behemoth, in league with Yahoo Finance, proclaimed its grand vision: to become the one-stop shop for the financially desperate, the greedy, and the deluded. Ah, what a spectacle of human folly!

The Grand AI Masquerade: Giants Dance in Governance Ball

Announced on a crisp California evening at the Linux Foundation’s annual gala-a soiree where the champagne flows as freely as the open-source platitudes-the Foundation now boasts 146 organizations, a menagerie of 18 Gold Members and 79 Silver souls. One might mistake it for a medieval guild, if not for the quantum servers.

The Great Bitcoin Signal: A Tale of $70K and Human Folly

The chart, an hourly relic, reveals a pattern so simple it borders on sacrilege: a sweep of the lows followed by a rebound, as if the market were a weary traveler pausing to catch its breath. Van de Poppe, with the solemnity of a man predicting the end of days, declares this an omen. “Hold above $65K,” he intones, “and we shall march toward $70K, come Friday’s options expiration.” One might question whether this is a prophecy or a plea to the gods of volatility.

Polkadot Shines Bright While Bitcoin Plays Catch-Up in Latest CoinDesk 20 Update

For those unacquainted with the CoinDesk 20, it is an index that includes a broad assortment of the digital assets most likely to inspire both confusion and enthusiasm in equal measure. Currently, this index is standing tall at 1937.2, reflecting an overall increase of 4.4% (+82.19) since the evening of Tuesday. Truly, it’s an uplifting moment for all who partake in the cryptocurrency market, or, dare I say, any who wish to experience the thrill of watching digital fortunes rise and fall with the grace of a well-timed waltz.

Bitwise Buys Chorus One: Crypto Love Story or Billion-Dollar Blunder?

Bitwise has officially acquired Chorus One, because nothing says “trust us” to investors quite like consolidating your competition. The deal promises to turbocharge Bitwise’s staking operations with Chorus One’s “scale, expertise, and wider network coverage,” which is just a fancy way of saying they’re hoping to avoid looking like a startup that forgot to grow up. The move also claims to address the “rising institutional demand for secure, yield-generating crypto infrastructure solutions.” Translation: Institutions are clearly just dying to park their cash in digital vaults managed by people who’ve never seen a balance sheet.

Moonpay’s AI Agents: Autonomous, Unshackled, and Possibly a Bit Too Smart?

On the 24th of February, 2026, Moonpay, ever the alchemist of finance, unveiled Moonpay Agents, a developer’s dream woven into the Moonpay CLI. This platform, a pivotal moment in the “agent economy,” provides AI systems with the infrastructure to hold value and transact, all while human oversight slumbers. Once a user completes a one-time KYC verification-a ritual as ancient as bureaucracy itself-and funds a wallet, their AI agent, that digital serf, can programmatically trade, swap assets, and move funds across various blockchains, as if guided by the whims of a capricious god.