🚀 WazirX Rises from the Ashes: Crypto Phoenix or Just a Fancy Pigeon? 🪙

The $230 million security breach (which, let’s be honest, is enough to make even the most stoic CFO weep into their spreadsheet) effectively turned India’s oldest crypto exchange into a digital ghost town. 👻 But fear not, dear traders, for the phoenix has risen from the ashes, or at least, it’s trying to. WazirX co-founder Nischal Shetty (who probably hasn’t slept in 16 months) confirmed that trading will resume on October 24. Tokens will be enabled over four days, because even crypto needs a warm-up before the marathon. 🏃♂️ By October 27, it’ll be business as usual-or as usual as crypto ever gets. Shetty, in a post on X (formerly known as Twitter, because why not add more confusion?), said:

How Blockchain.com Danced Through EU Regulations – With a Touch of Maltese Charm and a Wink 😏

With this license, the venerable firm is now authorized to do what it does best across thirty European countries-offer custody and wallet services-like a seasoned concierge in a bustling casino. And if you think that’s all, they’re eyeing the big leagues: institutional services, treasury management, and all the jazz that makes bankers chuckle with delight.

Robinhood Gets Wild with BNB and HYPE – Here’s What’s Next! 😱🚀

With a staggering 26 million users, Robinhood has become the playground for wannabe Wall Street wolves (or perhaps sheep? 🐑). And now, they’re adding BNB to the mix, which means your portfolio can finally be as complicated as your Netflix recommendations. Other crypto options already on the platform include the classics-Bitcoin (BTC), Ethereum (ETH), and that Dogecoin you pretend to understand. No biggie.